Love & Sanctuary
by Lady Kiddymonster
Summary: A sadly AU piece set around end of 3.5. Contains potential 3.5 spoilers. Distraught and angered by the fact no one listened Dr Clarkson goes to Isobel for comfort and finds an unexpected understanding and sanctuary as they discover love and help others to do the same.
1. Chapter 1

**Love & Sanctuary**

**A/N: A sadly AU piece set around end of 3.5. Distraught and angered by the fact no one listened Dr Clarkson goes to Isobel for comfort and finds an unexpected understanding and sanctuary as they discover love.**

Edith followed Dr Clarkson out into the hallway.

"I'm truly sorry Lady Edith," he whispered, "I am sure I could have saved her given the chance."

"I know all too well what it's like when no one listens to you, Dr Clarkson," Edith said gently, "I have had a lifetime of that but in my case it has never led to anyone dying. The fact is that Mama and Tom don't blame you because they saw how hard you tried. Do you want me to drive you home?"

Clarkson shook his head.

"Thank you Lady Edith but you should stay with your family; I shall walk,"

He walked out of Downton and Edith sighed for she knew exactly how he felt.

He walked down into the village; the skies were lightening and it was chilly and damp.

He thought about going home and getting drunk but that wasn't the answer; the idea of being alone with his thoughts and intense feelings was not good. He spent too much time alone as it was.

The family would be consoling each other. Clarkson was grateful for what Lady Edith had said to him.

He wondered who he might confide in; in truth there was only one person he wanted to talk to and be with at this time. He had been thinking about Isobel Crawley rather a lot recently and he did not know why. They often argued vehemently but he admired her passion. She had a good heart and the thought that she might console him spurred him on. He suspected she may still be waiting on news for Matthew had been far too preoccupied to have telephoned his mother.

Dr Richard Clarkson had never felt so desolate or alone as he did right now and he knew that Isobel retained some kind of distance from the family. The thought of being in Isobel's arms came unbidden to his mind and he was shocked by the intensity with which he found he wanted this.

Ethel had gone to bed and Isobel was drinking tea. Matthew had called to tell her that Sybil had had a baby girl and that Sir Philip Tapsell and Clarkson had bickered constantly during the waiting time. Isobel had not gone to Downton that evening; she felt angry that Clarkson, who had delivered all of Lord Grantham's daughters, had been supplanted by an eminent titled doctor who knew nothing of the family or its medical history. Isobel had been enraged on Clarkson's behalf. She found herself thinking about him again and dismissed the thought from her mind. Isobel was a fiercely independent woman and felt she had settled reasonably in Yorkshire although it was a world away from the life she had known in Manchester. Now she filled her hours with good causes and volunteer work but she had realised in recent months that this was to try and avoid facing the fact that she was desperately lonely. She missed having someone's arms around her; her life was empty and she suspected that Clarkson worked long hours for exactly the same reason. But she had Matthew and, as far as she knew, Clarkson had no one to care for him; no one to cook him an occasional meal or sit and talk with him of an evening.

.Isobel was shocked to hear a frantic pounding on the door.

She went to open it; despite warnings from Matthew against opening the door at odd hours but Isobel did not care for it was almost dawn and Ethel would soon be up.

She felt her heart flutter when she found Clarkson on the doorstep; he was pale and looked like he had been crying for his eyes were red-rimmed.

"Richard," she gasped as she stood aside to let him in, "What on earth has happened?"

"Oh Isobel," he sighed, "Tapsell would not listen to me and as a result Lady Sybil died of eclampsia not one hour ago. I have never felt so helpless in my entire life,"

"Oh that dear sweet girl," tears came to Isobel's eyes for she had been very fond of Sybil.

He sat in Isobel's small sitting room; she pressed a glass of whisky into his hand and he smiled at her.

"Tell me what happened," she said gently as she moved to sit beside him. The smell of her perfume intoxicated him much as Isobel was aware of his faint antiseptic and cologne smell which comforted her. She felt touched he had come to her.

So he told her everything; including how helpless he had felt seeing Sybil in the horrific fits brought on by the condition he had tried to make himself heard over. Isobel sensed both rage and quiet despair in his voice and made up her mind that she would not let him down.

Before he had finished his body was tensed with sobs and his face awash with tears. Isobel put her arms around him and held him close. She said nothing but let him cry as she soothed him; gently stroking his hair and back with tenderness he had never expected. Being so near to him made Isobel realised he needed her and she realised with a shock that she needed him too.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Isobel went out into the hallway as she heard Ethel descend the stairs.

"Has Lady Sybil had the baby yet?" Ethel enquired.

Isobel ushered her into the kitchen and closed the door.

"Yes she had a baby girl but there were complications and Lady Sybil has died because they did not listen to Dr Clarkson,"

Ethel turned pale.

"Dr Clarkson came here because he needed someone to talk to. I want you to make us some tea and some breakfast which you are to serve without asking him any awkward questions and he was never here, do you understand?"

"Yes Mrs Crawley, I understand."

"Now I assume porridge and toast isn't beyond your limited domestic capabilities?"

"I can manage that Mrs Crawley,"

"Good, as soon as possible please. He needs some decent food as I dread to think when he last ate properly,"

"Yes Mrs Crawley, I will make a start right away,"

Ten minutes later Ethel brought in the tea tray and redoubled back to the kitchen. Isobel pressed a steaming cup of tea into Clarkson's hand and he felt fortified as the hot sweet liquid ran down his throat.

"Oh Richard, you really must take better care of yourself. You look exhausted and I'll bet you rarely eat breakfast."

"I am shattered physically and emotionally Isobel; I would have fallen apart this morning but for you. I was sorely tempted to go home and get drunk, I must admit, but I decided I could not bear to be alone with my thoughts. I needed someone to actually listen to how I felt for once."

"I will be here for you and I will fight your corner I promise."

"You don't think Lord Grantham will get me struck off do you?"

"There would be no grounds since you did nothing wrong; if anyone ought to be struck off it should be that Sir Philip Tapsell," Isobel spoke the name with vehement distaste.

He felt great comfort from her support of him and he was still aware of how he had felt when she had held him.

Ethel brought their breakfast; much to Isobel's relief she had not burnt it. They ate hungrily.

He wiped his mouth with a napkin.

"I feel much better," he said, as he finished his tea.

"You really ought to rest Richard; how long is it since you had a decent night's sleep?"

"I honestly can't remember," he sighed, "but how could I sleep now, when my mind is disturbed by the fragility of human life? I saw it during the war and I tried to pretend it did not affect me but it hit home last night. A beautiful sweet young girl died because someone thought they knew better. I delivered her Isobel; I delivered all Lord Grantham's daughters and that man did not know them from Adam. It's such a terrible waste Isobel,"

She took his hand in hers and pressed it to her cheek.

"I will be here for you whenever you need me Richard,"

Her words touched him deeply. Her tenderness towards him as she had held him close. She had listened to him and that meant so much he knew he would live on the memory of being held for a while until another memory eclipsed it.

Had he loved her all this time and only just realised it? He suspected not; he suspected he had known but refused to admit it to himself and, owing to his stubbornness; he had lost out on many shared meals and evenings of companionship. Was it a weakness to tell someone you needed them?

He left soon after.

Isobel poured herself another cup of tea and stirred sugar into it.

She remembered how it had felt to hold him in her arms while he wept; she remembered the smell of him and that she had touched him. The realisation that he had needed her made her feel good. He had truly appreciated her as a friend and Isobel was shocked to realise that she wanted them to be far more to each other than merely friends. She caught herself shivering as she contemplated what it would feel like to feel his mouth on hers. She wanted him to kiss her without mercy.

In the darkest moment of his despair, when he had actually been blaming himself for Sybil's death, Isobel had been trying to withhold tears from her own eyes because, in that very moment, she had finally admitted to herself in the depth of her heart that she loved him.

Clarkson stopped outside the hospital.

If admitting to someone that you needed them made you weak then he wanted to be weak and lying in Isobel Crawley's arms. He had been forced to confront the fragility of humanity and the fact that he was not a young man anymore. He worked late many nights to delay his return to a cold empty house. For now he would be grateful to the fact she had been there for him and try to keep romance off the agenda; he would take her to the Grantham Arms for dinner as a thank you of course. But he could not quite stop the shivers he felt when he remembered being in her arms and the idea of what it would be like to feel her mouth on his, caressing him gently yet with the passion he desperately craved.

He knew then that he loved her and, more to the point that he always had.

.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**A/N: As far as I can recall we have never seen any scenes in Clarkson's own home so any description is down to my imagination and artistic license.**

Isobel went to Downton; well prepared to find a gloomy atmosphere. She expected Cousin Robert to be irritable but it served him right, Isobel thought. If he had listened to Richard then he might still have three daughters. Clarkson had told her that there was no cast iron guarantee he could have saved Sybil had he been given the chance to act but it was better than the chance Tapsell's overbearing attitude had given her.

Isobel made up her mind that she would defend Clarkson as vehemently as she could; any slight against the man and she would dig her nails in at least metaphorically.

Carson let her in.

"It's a very sad time Mrs Crawley,"

"Yes it is, Lady Sybil was such a dear sweet girl,"

She followed Carson to the library where she found Matthew and Edith. Cora was apparently in her room and Robert was in the study. Mary was in the nursery with Tom and the baby.

"Mother, I'm sorry," Matthew said, "I should have called but you can imagine what things have been like here since Sybil died."

"Yes I can imagine. I saw Dr Clarkson this morning; he told me what had happened,"

"Papa should have listened to him," Edith said, "Dr Clarkson delivered all of us so he knows our medical histories back to front but Papa did not want to hurt Sir Philip's feelings."

"How is tom bearing up?"

"He hasn't come out of their room since," Matthew said.

"Mary & I have tried to help but how can we even begin to understand what it's like for him," Matthew said.

"Well if Papa and Granny had not stuck their oars in by venting their petty insignificant prejudices I could have been married to a man who knows exactly where Tom is right now because he's been there," Edith said a trace of bitterness in her voice, "Anthony would have helped him get through it,"

Isobel felt for her because she had liked Sir Anthony Strallan very much.

Carson came in.

"His Lordship wishes to see you Mr Matthew,"

"I'm coming," Matthew said. He left the room with Carson.

Edith invited Isobel to sit down.

"So what's been happening Edith?"

"Well Mama and Papa are not speaking because Mama was on Clarkson's side as were the rest of us and Granny."

The notion that the dowager had been on Clarkson's side both touched and surprised Isobel.

Isobel decided she could be frank with Edith; she knew the young woman had always been on the fringe of her family.

"Dr Clarkson came knocking on my door just before dawn," Isobel said, "He was physically and emotionally shattered; just needed someone to talk to. I listened to him and gave him tea and breakfast. I'm very worried about him to be honest Edith; I'm not sure when he last had a decent meal and a good night's sleep,"

"Just be there for him cousin Isobel; we're all on his side,"

Isobel was shocked to find her eyes filling with tears; she dabbed at them with a clean handkerchief.

"I held him close while he sobbed in my arms, Edith; at one point he even seemed to blame himself and it was then I realised,"

"Realised what?" It suddenly dawned on Edith.

"You love him don't you?" she said gently

"Yes," Isobel said softly, "I think I always have; I realised at that moment that I want to be with and look after him."

"Then you must tell him," Edith's face was earnest, "I never told Anthony I loved him and I think it would have been alright if I had. Please don't make that mistake cousin Isobel; you have a chance of happiness so I beg you to grab it with both hands. You were married to a doctor so you have an idea of what his life is like,"

"I will, Edith,"

Isobel left Downton soon after as Matthew, Cora and Mary showed no signs of putting in an appearance.

She went to the hospital.

Clarkson was handing over to one of the locum doctors who sometimes filled in. He smiled when he saw Isobel.

"I can't concentrate," he said, "I need a good meal and a good rest in some highly desirable company,"

They went outside.

"Do you want to come to my house Isobel? If I fall asleep at yours and don't wake until morning I have no desire to compromise you,"

"I'm a respectable widow, Richard; not some silly unmarried girl but yes I would like to see your place. I must leave a note for Matthew though, just in case he pops home."

She did so and then left Crawley house in Clarkson's company.

Clarkson's home was tidy and clean; the rooms were light and airy; the decor and furniture simple and somewhat minimalist.

"I don't often get visitors," he said, "So I'm privileged to bring you here Isobel,"

"I consider it a privilege to be here,"

She followed him into the kitchen which was spotlessly clean; polished white worktops and shiny scrubbed stainless steel. The table was pinewood.

"Please sit down," he said.

About half an hour later he had served her a pleasant meal of grilled fish, potato and green vegetables. They consumed it along with water.

"This tastes divine, Richard," she said clearly impressed even as she wondered why he did not feed himself properly more often. But she suspected he did not spend much time here; he probably stayed away as often as possible delaying the inevitable return to an empty house.

Isobel helped him wash and dry the cutlery, crockery and utensils; she seemed contented that they were able to get along together; without much communication they seemed to know what was required of them.

She made them tea and they returned to the sitting room where she sat next to him.

"You really do look tired, Richard,"

"It's catching up with me," he admitted, "I've had a couple of sleepless nights in the last week what with Lady Sybil having false alarms; I can't face the thought of sleeping alone."

"You won't need to be alone," she held his hand and he felt a shiver go through him.

"Isobel, I don't care if admitting this makes me weak but I really do need you. I would rather be weak and have a lovely woman like you by my side than be strong and have no one,"

"I realised when you were sobbing in my arms this morning that I need you too,"

"Will you please hold me Isobel? You have no idea how good it felt to be in your arms earlier."

She held him close to her and he slipped his arms around her in turn; intoxicated by her perfume and her clean soapy smell. She looked into his eyes.

"I realised something else at that moment," her fingertips caressed his spine sending shivers through him. She lightly kissed his cheek.

"I love you, Dr Richard Clarkson," she murmured, "and I think I always have,"

"I love you too Isobel and you have no idea how long I have wanted to hear those words from your lips,"

They held each other tightly.

"Will you stay with me while I sleep, Isobel?"

"Of course my darling," she murmured, "I won't leave your side all night,"

"Thank you," he whispered,

They went to his room which had a thick russet carpet, nondescript watercolour prints on the walls and the bed linen was clean with a paisley counterpane.

He showed her the bathroom where she stripped down to her petticoats and he took off everything save his underpants. They lay in his bed and he held her close as she rested her head on his chest. He had a lean yet well sculpted body.

He was asleep in moments and she lay still for a time; he needed to rest and she would look after him. After a while she drifted off to sleep too and dreamt about becoming his lover.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Isobel awoke once in the late evening to find the room bathed in silvery moonlight. Richard was still sleeping and she realised he needed it. She was thankful he did not seem to be having any bad dreams about the night of Sybil's death but she knew that, if he did, then she would soothe and comfort him. He looked like he had found some kind of inner peace and she realised also just how handsome he was.

She lay awake for a time; enjoying the intimacy of being nestled in his arms. To hear the words "I love you," from his lips had been the sweetest sound she had heard in a long time and for her to say them to him after denying it for so long tasted sweet as honey. She wondered anew what it would be like to feel his mouth on hers as well as his intimate caress. Isobel realised she was sweating and found herself absolutely aching for him but he needed rest and the waiting would be sweeter for it.

She drifted back to sleep.

Clarkson awoke as the sunlight was flooding the room. He sighed deeply. Isobel lay sleeping in his arms and he realised how rested and content he felt; a feeling he had not experienced since, well he could not remember when.

She stirred gently in his arms and made a small noise.

"Good morning Isobel," he said.

"Good morning Richard," she smiled, "You look much better,"

"I feel so much better Isobel my love,"

"I dreamt about being your lover,"

"Well I'm a wee bit out of practice there Isobel so I doubt I will be sensational,"

She whispered in his ear, "Oh I think you will be Richard; I think you will be everything any woman could want. I know that you are everything I could need or want,"

"I know you love me darling Isobel; you have stayed and kept me comfortable and being wrapped in your arms is something I never dared to hope I would experience,"

"I never dared dream I would ever be like this with you either," she whispered, "I always wanted to experience your bedside manner in private,"

"Will you come and spend tonight with me Isobel? I've been a doctor for too long so now I want to be a man with you,"

"How can I resist that invitation Richard?" she flirted, "How can any self respecting woman not want such a handsome desirable man as yourself? A discerning widow knows what she wants and I want you," she flushed, "to tell you the truth you get me into a rather unladylike lather,"

"Do I now?" he flirted back

"Richard," she murmured, "What I would really like is to have breakfast and then spend all day here making love with you,"

"I think that can be arranged Isobel," he murmured, "Because that is what I want too."

He lent her a dressing gown and they descended to the kitchen where he fixed them both breakfast and tea which they consumed in the kitchen,

"I want to look after you Richard," she said,

"No woman has ever wanted to do that before," he said as tears filled his eyes.

He held her hand.

"Isobel Crawley, will you marry me?"

"Yes," she said softly as a smile spread across her face," I would love to,"

Isobel was daydreaming about looking at Richard across the breakfast table and she found she liked the idea. He was in his study telephoning the hospital to check everything was alright; he hoped that there would be nothing requiring his attention because for that one day he wanted only Isobel.

He returned to the kitchen.

"Everything is alright; Dr Markham said to take a couple of days rest."

"I'm not sure what we are planning is exactly restful,"

"It's a rest from my normal lonely existence," he replied.

"A much needed one,"

He pulled her into his arms and claimed her mouth with his; completely taking her breath away. Isobel kissed him back; as her mouth caressed his she felt her heart pound as his tongue explored her. She had never been kissed that way before and she was exhilarated as Richard's mouth caressed her throat and moved up to nibble her ear lobe.

"Do you consent to a full in depth examination Mrs Crawley?" he teased making her tremble at the sensation of his warm breath in her ear. His voice was hoarse and Isobel's erect nipples strained against the dressing gown he had lent her.

"Yes I do," she said throatily, "My god you are gorgeous, Dr Richard, I really look forward to experiencing your bedside manner,"

She pressed against him, acutely aware of his need as she became aware of her own. She was well aware he had stirred her into another unladylike lather and she realised every nerve and fibre of her being ached for him.

"I love you Isobel Crawley," he whispered.

"Prove it," she fluttered her eyelashes at him as she pressed her full lips into a sultry pout.

He gathered her effortlessly into his strong arms and carried her back upstairs. Isobel had never been carried to bed before and she was rather enjoying the attention.

Seductively she loosed the cord of her dressing gown and let it fall to the carpet. Richard was wide-eyed as she swiftly removed her silken undergarment so she stood naked before him.

"You have no idea how incredibly erotic that was Isobel," he gasped.

He saw a pool of milky fluid glisten on her inner thighs and his breath caught in his throat; god she was beautiful. She was curvaceous with silky smooth skin which was slightly wrinkled and puckered in places owing to her age but that only made her more beautiful in his eyes. He didn't want a flawless young debutante with no idea about the harsher side of life. Isobel had lived and been through it and she wore those marks of age like battle scars.

Isobel untied his dressing gown and let it fall beside hers and he swiftly removed his underpants making her gasp at the sight of his arousal. She took him in; her eyes running appreciatively over his nakedness. Unlike other men his age he had not run to fat and had a splendid albeit lean muscle tone. She knew he was strong because of the way he held her so tightly and the way he had carried her upstairs without even breaking a sweat. Her eyes filled with tears; she had wanted him for so long and he was now going to be hers.

They fell onto the bed a tangle of limbs; mouths and hands caressing and kissing ardently.

"Isobel," he murmured.

"I love you Richard; I really do,"

He kissed her.

"You are a wonderful woman Isobel Crawley,"

His mouth descended to her breasts; his tongue swirled around and across her rose pink nipples, down her cleavage and underneath. She shivered violently and knew her breathing was ragged.

Richard's mouth descended to her sex; his tongue ran along her slit and began gently probing her labia as it hooked her engorged clitoris so he could suck it. Isobel moaned loudly as intense waves of pleasure ripped through her body making all her hairs stand on end and she trembled violently; aware that she cared about nothing but him and the sensations he was giving her.

He sighed as her honey sweet fluid trickled into his mouth and down his throat. Richard drank like he had found an oasis after wandering in the desert; aroused by the sensation of Isobel's helplessly trembling body and her soft cries.

He moved back up her body, pausing to suck at her breasts. He slipped inside her and she moaned softly as she became aware of his steady strokes caressing her secret place. She pressed up against him and dug her nails into his back.

"Oh god Isobel," he cried out before she drew his head down to hungrily claim his mouth. His moustache tickled her but that heightened her desire. She had almost lost control of her bodily functions at the sensation of his mouth between her legs.

They were drenched with sweat as she wrapped her legs around him.

She pushed against him with increased force and speed so he thrust harder to match her efforts. Richard was breathless with emotion; he had forgotten how good and exquisite carnal pleasure could be.

Isobel felt a rush of sticky fluid trickle from her and her entire body was gripped as a tremendous climax gripped then relaxed her body.

"Richard, oh Richard," she shouted his name as if proclaiming a triumph.

Moments later he released his sticky seminal fluid inside her body.

"Oh god Isobel,"

He lay on top of her for a moment to recover his ragged breath before rolling over and pulling her into his arms. She closed her eyes and inhaled his musky post-coital smell. They were slicked with sweat. Isobel's eyes filled with tears as she cried and he comforted her, tangling his fingers in her hair.

"I think we both needed that, darling Richard,"

"Thank you," he murmured, "Oh my Isobel,"

They did not speak for a while; just cuddled each other and Isobel knew from that moment that he was hers, she was his and whatever happened they would face it together.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

It was early evening and Isobel lay in bed; Richard's arms around her. She had lost count of the number of times they had made love and was breathless with exhilaration.

"Oh Richard," she moaned softly as his hand trailed down her naked back, "You really are a wonderful lover,"

"You are wonderful too; I have never felt so loved and I don't think I have ever felt so satisfied," he kissed her, "I love you Isobel; not only are you a beautiful desirable woman but you are a great comfort to me. You have saved me from despair and made me feel complete,"

He sighed deeply, "I know now why we argued constantly back during the war; it was because we could not admit what was between us."

"Believe me those arguments aroused me more than you can ever know; I wish I had just kissed you mid argument but to my shame I could not admit to myself back then that you made me feel more alive than I had since Matthew's father died. I didn't recognise that I wanted you more than I have ever wanted anyone."

"I could not admit it to myself either, Isobel, but I had the most incredibly lurid dreams about making love to you," he looked into her eyes with an intensity that sent shivers through her,"

"Do you think Matthew will accept me?"

"Matthew is of an age where he understands that widows move on and I honestly don't think he will have a problem; we are consenting adults after all,"

"Speaking of which," he murmured.

They made love once again and collapsed shivering in each other's arms.

"Today has been the most wonderfully fulfilling day of my entire life," he murmured as he nuzzled her bare shoulder.

"The feeling is entirely mutual, Richard my darling,"

They got up and took a hot shower together. Isobel shivered as he soaped her curvaceous body with a soft cloth. He washed her hair and she pressed against him beneath the cascade.

She washed every inch of his well toned body smiling as his manhood came partly to life in her hand.

He rubbed her dry with a towel and she did the same to him and they dressed and descended to the kitchen. Isobel made them tea.

"If you want the truth, Richard, I always have been very much on the fringe of the set up at Downton; I think I am only tolerated because I'm the mother of Lord Grantham's heir and the dowager countess and I rub one another up the wrong way,"

"I wouldn't worry about that Isobel; Lady Grantham does that to everyone including me,"

"I would like us to get married on the quiet; maybe just telling Matthew, Mary and Edith. Just a quiet intimate do; I had the full works when I married Matthew's father,"

"I understand that, Isobel; I'm not for major society functions either. I suggest I pop into York tomorrow and visit the Registry office. I can apply for a special licence. Will you need a wedding dress?"

"No, a smart suit or dress will do fine. Would you like to come to tea tomorrow? I will invite Matthew, Mary & Edith too so we can tell them then,"

"That sounds fine Isobel," he slipped his arm around her and kissed her neck, "I suspect they may think you're a bit of a dark horse,"

"Well at least it won't be for the usual reasons a girl decides to get married suddenly, I know I am past all that,"

"Unfortunately so dear Isobel,"

"Are you saying you would like to have a child Richard?"

"I think I could have been a doting father, Isobel; sadly the chance never presented itself but a stepson will do me well enough,"

"Well Matthew is a bit beyond needing bedtime stories but I understand what you mean,"

Isobel left soon after; she had to go to Crawley House to ensure Ethel had not managed to raze the place to the ground.

Richard Clarkson sat up late into the night drinking whisky. He felt totally at peace with himself. The sense of inadequacy brought about by Sybil's death had melted away in Isobel's arms, The idea that Isobel wanted to be his wife made him feel really good. He would take her away to Scotland for a short honeymoon or maybe just a long weekend depending on how things at the hospital were looking although he knew that Dr Markham was more than capable of looking after things. Finally things seemed to be working out for him.

Isobel was very busy the next morning but Richard was constantly on her mind. She dressed in front of the full length mirror in her bedroom after taking a long bubble bath. She smiled as she remembered being in the shower with Richard and before that lying naked in his arms after their bout of passion. She noticed that her eyes were bright and her skin almost glowing. She loved him so much and wished she had been able to declare her heart sooner. She realised that she no longer felt the empty loneliness which had dogged her since the death of Matthew's father.

Ethel was busy making cakes.

"Who is it coming for tea Mrs Crawley?" she asked, "I don't want to make too much,"

"Dr Clarkson is coming as well as Matthew, Mary and Lady Edith,"

Richard arrived first and he presented her with a bouquet.

"Flowers for my lovely lady," he said kissing her on the cheek.

"Oh Richard they are beautiful; I can't remember the last time a man brought me flowers,"

Isobel summoned Ethel and asked her to put the flowers in a vase. Ethel did so and Isobel asked her to place them on the sitting room table.

"I wonder what mother wants," Matthew mused as he, Mary and Edith walked down to Crawley House.

"What does it matter?" Edith asked, "I'm glad to get out of that gloomy oppressive atmosphere for a couple of hours,"

Moseley showed them in to the sitting room where Isobel was talking to Richard.

"Come in my dears," she said,

They said hello to Richard and sat down. Matthew kissed his mother's cheek.

Ethel brought in the tea and poured it before leaving; she was very tempted to listen at the door because there had been a real change in her mistress in the last couple of days and Ethel wondered if it had something to do with Dr Clarkson. But she returned to the kitchen and made herself some tea.

"How are things up at Downton?" Isobel asked.

"In a word, gloomy," Edith sighed.

"I suspect I am still persona non grata with Lord Grantham," Clarkson interjected with a faint trace of bitterness in his voice.

"It was not your fault Dr Clarkson," Mary said, "Tom doesn't blame you and nor does Mama; I suspect Papa is already paying the price for not listening to you,"

"And meanwhile Sir Philip Tapsell goes about business as usual, how many more women must die of misdiagnosis before someone listens and strikes him off,"

"I am sure his mistake will catch up with him eventually Dr Clarkson," Edith said gently.

"I truly hope so Lady Edith,"

"Anyway, as to the real reason why I invited you here," Isobel took a deep breath, "Richard, that is Dr Clarkson, and I am going to get married,"


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

There was a brief silence during which Isobel anxiously studied her son's face for an emotional reaction.

"You're a dark horse cousin Isobel," Mary said.

"Not really," Isobel smiled as Richard took her hand, "There has always been something there between us; just took a while to get around to realising it."

"I intend to make your mother very happy Matthew," Richard said.

Matthew got up and shook Clarkson's hand.

"Congratulations," he said, "to be honest I do worry about my mother at times so this sets my mind at rest,"

"You're not angry; I was worried you might be,"

"Why should I be? You mourned my father for more than long enough and I just want you to be content; I know he would too. We all have to move on and I can see how happy you are together."

"We always suspected something like this might happen," Mary said, "the way you two argue is impossible without some simmering passion underlying it. I should know," she got up and hugged Isobel, "Congratulations, I hope you will be very happy,"

Edith offered her congratulations but she seemed far away and Isobel sensed she was thinking about Sir Anthony Strallan. If their engagement had been met with the same warmth then it might have been alright; instead if had been met with a lukewarm tolerance and prejudice against issues Anthony could do nothing about.

But Isobel said none of this; she did not want Edith ripped to shreds by Mary's prejudices again; she had never attempted to even like or get to know Anthony.

"We want to get married on the quiet," Isobel said, "so that is why we are only telling the three of you,"

"Best way," Edith said, "to get married the way you want to, not the way everyone thinks you should do it," there was a trace of bitterness in her voice which Mary did not seem to notice but Isobel, Matthew and Richard did. Isobel wanted to comfort Edith but could not do so in present company although she knew that Matthew sympathised with Edith over what had happened at Downton church that day.

They talked about Isobel & Richard's wedding for a time and Ethel brought in more tea.

Finally they left and Richard put his arms around Isobel.

"Well that certainly went down better than I expected," he said.

"Yes it did," she kissed him.

Edith had retired to her room. She was thoroughly delighted for Isobel and Clarkson but it had brought her own pain to the forefront. She took out the one photograph she possessed of Anthony and looked at it as tears streamed down her face. Why had she not told him she loved him? It was too late now she reasoned; she never expected to ever see him again and right now, more than anything, she wanted to look into those blue eyes.

Mary and Matthew were in bed.

"So how do you feel about your mother remarrying?" she asked.

"I'm actually rather pleased; I won't worry so much if I know Clarkson is looking after her and they do seem rather happy,"

"Clarkson looks like all his wishes have come true at once," Mary winked.

"Really Mary!" Matthew feigned shock, "I have no wish to speculate on what my mother does in private,"

"Well it's obvious," Mary grinned; Matthew rolled his eyes but laughed anyway.

Richard lay in Isobel's arms; both of them slicked with sweat after making love. He wished he had told her years before how he felt about her for he felt he had wasted time and he knew that he would keep his vows until the inevitable separation by death.

"Darling Isobel," he murmured, "I love you so much and you are everything I could ever want. It will be a real privilege to be your husband and I will look after you."

She propped herself up on one elbow so she could look into his eyes. She kissed him gently.

"Richard darling; I love you too and I want to make you deliriously happy,"

"I already am, Isobel," he smiled, "tomorrow I will go and see what can be done about making you Mrs Clarkson."

"I look forward to it," she smiled.

The following day Isobel dropped into the hospital to visit Richard. When he saw her he hugged her so fiercely he lifted her off the ground.

"Oh Richard," she gasped," That is quite a welcome,"

He kissed her hard on the mouth still holding her tightly against him. She kissed him back well aware that they were both trembling.

"Isobel darling, are you free a week on Tuesday?"

Isobel pretended to think.

"Yes,"

"Good because that day I can make you Mrs Clarkson,"

"That's terrific news,"

"They will need to see your marriage certificate and Reginald's death certificate,"

"I will take them in the next couple of days,"

"Splendid, Oh Isobel I just can't wait to make you my wife,"

She left because Richard was busy catching up with the latest hospital news since his absence. On the way back to Crawley House she ran into Matthew who informed her that Mary was sending time with Tom and her niece.

"Would you like tea Matthew? Only there is something I would like to speak with you about and I rarely see you alone these days,"

"Mother, I really have no problem with you & Clarkson getting married because happiness is long overdue and I know he'll look after you,"

"Oh it's about something else entirely,"

"Well yes it would be good for us to spend some quality time together,"

They went into Crawley House and Isobel instructed Ethel to bring them tea which she did.

"First of all, are you free a week Tuesday because Richard has managed to get a special license for then?"

"No problem," Matthew said, "I will tell Mary and Edith at dinner later,"

"Matthew, do you think Edith really loves Sir Anthony Strallan?"

"I think she does," Matthew was serious, "But the way cousin Robert and cousin Violet carried on he must have felt he was not good enough for Edith and lacking confidence as he does he didn't or wouldn't stand up for himself. But what he did he did it out of love,"

"That's what I think too," Isobel sipped her tea, "I was thinking of inviting him to the wedding. Cousin Roberts and Violet will not be there to interfere, if he and Edith could just talk,"

"I think you will be playing with fire, mother, Much as I love Mary she is no fan of Sir Anthony's,"

"I don't understand why. He is a very kind and gentle man, very decent too."

"Mary thinks he's dull but it's what Edith thinks that matters. If you invite him I will try to keep her distracted but then again if you invite him there is no guarantee he will accept,"

"That's true," Isobel said, "But I will invite him,"

"I will do what I can to help; I think Sir Anthony likes Dr Clarkson so he is sure to want to wish you both the best,"

"Not a word to Mary or to Edith though,"

"Mum's the word," Matthew winked.

Sir Anthony Strallan sighed deeply. He had been so sure at the time he was doing the right thing about Edith but every day since had convinced him of his folly; long empty hours stretching ahead towards the inexorable night time when he would drink far too much whisky and sadly read the beautiful poems they had enjoyed together; without her though they had lost their soul and exquisite beauty.

"Oh darling Edith," he sighed, "What have I done to you, to us? Can you ever forgive me for what I have done?"

His butler brought the post and Anthony was surmised to see a thick embossed envelope which he felt sure was a wedding invitation. His heart stood still. Had she found someone else?

Anthony opened it carefully and sighed with almost relief to read the invitation.

_**Mrs Isobel Crawley invites you to be a guest at her forthcoming marriage **_

_**To**_

_**Dr Richard Clarkson**_

_**To be held at York registry office on Tuesday 14**__**th**__** at 2 pm.**_

_**RSVP**_

Anthony smiled, "Clarkson, you sly dog!" he laughed. He liked Isobel too; she at least had done her best to make the idea of him and Edith more palatable to her family. He felt he couldn't not go and wish them well but if Edith was there. Would his heart be able to stand it?

But it was time he stopped wallowing in self pity and faced up to things.

He took out an invitation reply card and wrote.

Isobel tore open the envelope with enthusiasm and smiled when she recognised the Strallan coat of arms embossed on the paper.

_Dear Mrs Crawley_

_Thank you for your invitation. Dr Clarkson is certainly a dark horse!_

_I should be delighted to attend as I sense it will be a small gathering. I'm not prepared for big social functions as yet they would be far too uncomfortable emotionally after what happened._

_I wish you the very best for the future and look forward to seeing you on the day_

_Anthony Strallan._


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

**A/N: given Mary's interference in the past I thought it would be good if she could not attend Isobel & Richard's wedding for some reason leaving the field clear for Edith & Anthony to talk.**

On the day of the wedding Mary awoke with a terrible migraine.

"Are you alright?" Matthew asked as she rubbed her temples and sighed dramatically.

"I feel terrible about missing the wedding Matthew but I think it would be best if I remained home today. I won't bother Dr Clarkson as he will be busy this morning. Mama has some aspirin."

"I am sure mother will understand," Matthew said. Isobel had not confirmed to him that Sir Anthony would be attending but Matthew knew he had been invited. He was secretly glad for Edith's sake.

Mary covered her face with the sheet.

"Are you sure you will be alright?" Matthew fussed. He loved his wife but when it came to her attitude to her surviving sister, Edith, they often disagreed.

"I'll be fine Matthew," Mary practically shooed him out of the room.

Since Matthew, Mary & Edith were the only people to know about Isobel's wedding nothing more was said. Matthew made out that he would be doing estate business that afternoon while Edith said she was going shopping in York and neither Cora nor Robert batted an eyelid.

"It's a shame Mary can't come," Edith said as they drove towards York just after lunch, "but she isn't much fun when she has a migraine,"

"Tell me something I don't know," Matthew said. He was wondering if he should let on that his mother had invited Anthony. He did not want Edith to be too shocked and also he did not want her to be disappointed if Anthony did not show.

"It will bring back painful memories," Edith sighed, "Oh I know Dr Clarkson isn't planning on jilting your mother but still,"

"It will be alright, Edith. It's a registrar, not Travis and it's not at the same place,"

"I wish you had been my brother rather than Mary being my sister," Edith sighed, "We would have had a good sibling relationship; at least you stand up for me. Sybil used to and I miss her so much,"

"I know," Matthew said, "I can't even begin to imagine how poor Tom must feel,"

They parked the car in York near the registry office.

Isobel was waiting for them. She looked splendid in a dark purple two piece suit and a lilac blouse.

"You look wonderful cousin Isobel," Edith said.

"Thank you my dear; I expect Richard looks wonderful too."

"Mary sends her apologies," Matthew said, "She woke up with a bad migraine."

"Not to worry," Isobel said, "these things happen,"

They talked for a little while because they had arrived early. Edith remembered the anticipation of seeing Anthony in the church and he had looked so incredibly gorgeous. She blinked away tears. It just was not fair; her family's prejudices about his age and injury had sealed their fate she was sure and Edith was not certain she would ever forgive her father or grandmother for making out they knew what was best for her. Mind you she had also put undue pressure on Anthony; managing to arrange a society wedding in a month was no mean feat but he had said to her was she sure she would not wait. Had that been a veiled code he needed more time? If so Edith was ashamed she had missed it. If she could have that time over again she knew she would do things very differently but she felt sure no second chance would ever come. She had thought he was her last chance and she had missed out before the war thanks to Mary's acid tongue.

Isobel was anxious; Anthony seemed to be a man of his word but as the hands of the clock crept ever nearer to the time when she would start the ceremony which would make her Mrs Clarkson drew ever nearer she was saddened. She had not told Matthew that Anthony had accepted her invitation and Edith did not even know he was invited. She looked beautiful in a jade green dress which made the most of her brown eyes and coppery hair. Isobel's heart went out to her.

Sir Anthony Strallan got out of the car when his chauffeur opened the door. His heart pounded and his palms sweated. He wore a dark navy suit and tie with a light blue shirt and a white carnation in his buttonhole. The blue shirt really made the most of his blue eyes and his dark blonde hair was gelled and neatly parted.

He walked in.

"I'm not late am I Mrs Crawley?"

Edith froze; she had just heard the voice she had never expected to hear again. She turned and found herself looking into a pair of intense blue eyes then she felt her head spin and she fainted.

Matthew helped her up while Isobel asked for a glass of water which she got her to sip slowly.

"Anthony," she breathed, "I never thought I would ever see you again,"

"Well let's get through the wedding," Matthew said, "then I will cover for Edith so the two of you can talk."

They went in and it was Isobel's breath got caught in her throat. Richard stood there in his morning suit and his hair neatly parted. Isobel thought he looked highly desirable and tried to ignore the pounding of her heart at the knowledge that she was moments from becoming his wife.

"We are here today to join together Isobel and Richard in matrimony," the registrar said.

They exchanged vows and Richard slipped a ring onto Isobel's finger.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife,"

Richard kissed her gently,

""I love you Mrs Clarkson," he whispered.

"I love you too," she said.

Anthony embraced them both.

"Congratulations," he said, "You are certainly a dark horse Dr Clarkson,"

The five of them went to a nearby hotel public bar for a drink. Richard & Isobel were to stay the night there. Edith sat very close to Anthony; she had recovered from her faint and was now looking at him with puppy dog eyes. Anthony felt his heart melt.

They had a couple of drinks before Matthew said, "Edith, I will cover for you,"

"You know my parents think I am shopping in York," Edith said, "It will be alright Matthew, thanks."

Richard & Isobel departed, hand in hand and Matthew went off to return to Downton.

At long last Lady Edith Crawley and Sir Anthony Strallan were alone for the first time in months.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**A/N Since this is an Isobel/Dr Clarkson pairing fanfic I am just making the future look better for Edith and Anthony so I hope I did the job. Steamy stuff to come owing to Isobel & Richard's wedding night.**

Anthony took Edith's hand in his good one and looked deep into her eyes.

"My sweet one, can you ever forgive me? I humiliated you in front of your family and I took note of everyone's opinion but yours. I have suffered every moment since believe me. I just thought I was doing the right thing but ever since I have realised I wasn't."

"I forgave you that same day my darling; I put undue pressure on you instead of letting us take our time and let my family get used to the idea of us."

She gently touched his cheek with her fingertips and he trembled slightly at her touch,"

"Would it have made any difference if I had told you I loved you and wanted to look after you? I would have been a wife much more than a nursemaid and you know it,"

"I know," he bowed his head,"I am truly sorry Lady Edith,"

"You hurt me Anthony, in fact you broke my heart, but I forgive you in love. You make me want to be a better person and you allow me to be myself and treat me like I matter. These last few months have been hell,"

"I wanted to write to you but I thought any letter would never reach you. I have suffered if that makes you feel better. The nightmares I had when I first returned from the war came back with a vengeance but Dr Clarkson seems to have that under control for me now,"

"You have already suffered so much, Anthony darling," she slipped an arm around him and drew him close to her, "If there is any way we can salvage something then I would be glad. I still want to be Lady Strallan more than anything in the whole world,"

"Edith, I wish I had told you I loved you,"

"I do love you Anthony, so much,"

"I know, I love you too, I was surprised when Mrs Crawley invited me to her wedding but I'm glad she did. I hope she and Clarkson are happy together; I think they'll be good for each other,"

"So do I but, between you and me, I think she's fancied him for years. It came about when Sybil died because no one listened to him and he just wanted comfort so he went to cousin Isobel,"

"Yes I read that Lady Sybil had died; I was very sorry. How is Tom coping?"

"Not very well to be honest; he spends long hours in the room where she died or in the nursery with the baby. I think he's taking it a day at a time,"

"It's all you can do in those circumstances," Anthony's tone was grave, "When Maud died I went to pieces,"

He sighed deeply,"Darling Lady Edith, would you give me a second chance?"

"Of course I will, my darling,"

"Please come and have dinner at Locksley tonight. My chauffeur will take us and also take you home,"

Edith threw her arms around him and kissed him on the lips. They both felt their spirits soar as she held him in her arms. For the first time in months the future looked bright for both of them.

Isobel & Richard were having a stroll around the York city walls. They had their arms around each other.

"Are you happy Mrs Clarkson?" he asked.

"Ecstatically," she replied.

"I'll make sure you experience my full undivided attention tonight my darling,"

"I look forward to it," she said.

Edith had telephoned to Carson and told him she would not be home for dinner because she had run into an old friend in York while Anthony had phoned Locksley to request his chauffeur and to say that he would be bringing a guest for dinner that night.

The chauffeur was prompt and Edith settled into the car on Anthony's left so he could hold her hand. They began the journey to Locksley and Edith felt her heart pound. It was so indescribably good to be near him again.

Isobel and Richard held hands across their table. The dining room was dimly lit by spotlights.

"I love you Richard," she said.

"I love you too Mrs Clarkson," Isobel felt a pleasant shiver run down her back when he called her by his surname. She caressed his hand and wrist.

"It was bold of you to invite Sir Anthony Strallan,"

"I wasn't sure if I should but Edith has suffered so and none of her family seem to care; in fact they are rather glad he didn't go through with it but they never think about what she wants and two people made for each other should be together. I did not know if he would accept but I'm glad he did, I just hope that they can salvage something and at least they have a chance to discuss the matter and their feelings properly without cousins Robert and Violet butting in,"

""I was a bit annoyed with Lady Grantham for dripping her poison," Richard replied, "Sir Anthony is a good decent man and copes more than adequately with his injury. She would be a wife much more than she would a nursemaid; of that I am in no doubt. He could do with a bit more confidence of course but we all lack that at some time or another,"

They finished their dinner.

"Would you like second helpings of dessert?" Isobel flirted and winked.

"Don't mind if I do Mrs Clarkson." He winked back and took her hand. They crossed the hotel lobby and ascended to their room.

Edith held Anthony's hand across the dining table at Locksley; the room was candlelit and Edith felt relaxed as she looked into those blue eyes trying to ignore the fact that her pulse was racing.

"It's jolly splendid to be able to spend some time with you, Edith," he murmured, "I honestly thought I forfeited the right to ever see you again after that day,"

She gently trailed her fingertips down his cheek.

"I'm glad to be here with you, Anthony; to spend time with you without Mary or my father or grandmother making snide remarks is pure bliss I can assure you,"

Her eyes filled with tears and she began to cry. Anthony got up and walked around the table where he crouched down by her chair and offered her his clean handkerchief before putting his arm around her.

"Hurting you was the last thing I ever wanted to do, Edith; you must believe me,"

"I do believe you Anthony," she smiled at him and his heart melted.

"I have hated myself since that day," he breathed as he gently stroked her back to soothe her.

"I have never hated you," she said softly, almost inaudibly.

"Will you give me a second chance my sweet one?" he asked," May god forgive me for having the arrogance to believe I could live without you; I know I no longer want to."

"I don't want to live without you either my love and you can have as many chances as you want because I know now that I will never find happiness with any other man while you live,"

His eyes filled with tears as he held her.

"Oh my lovely sweet Edith; I truly don't deserve you,"

"You do deserve me, Sir Anthony Strallan, and I chose you so you are more than good enough for me too; I love you and you are truly the most gorgeous man I have ever met,"

"

Richard carried Isobel across the threshold into their room and laid her on the four poster bed. Isobel smiled. She thought of the silky black camisole with black lace trim that she had taken from its wrapper only that morning. She had loved the feel of the silk and lace against her skin and dressed with delight at the thought of the surprise her new husband would get.

Her erect nipples strained against the lace trim of the camisole.

She knelt behind Richard and began to massage his shoulders; working out the tension with her strong fingers before bowing her head to caress his neck with her mouth.

"Oh Isobel," he murmured, "kiss me lower,"

Her mouth moved to caress the hollow of his neck. He trembled.

"Oh my god Mrs Clarkson, have you any idea how erotic that is?"

She got up and began to unbutton her blouse slowly revealing the black silk. Richard's breath caught in his throat.

Enjoying the thrill Isobel slowly removed her clothes and Richard's eyes scanned his wife's body. God what she was doing to him was deliciously erotic. She began to unbutton his shirt again deliberately slowly as she paused to kiss and caress his nipples with her sensual mouth. He trembled violently and sighed as he stood naked before her and her breath caught in her throat at the size of his arousal.

"Lie back Richard my love," she murmured gently pushing him back onto the pillows. She straddled him; the silk camisole rising up her thigh and bottom as she effortlessly sank onto his erection. She rode him hard; enjoying his soft moaning as her hands caressed his chest and tweaked his erect nipples. She gripped his thighs with hers.

He rolled Isobel onto her back and took her; thrusting deep hard and fast whilst taking her breath away with kisses that scorched her soul. Their bodies were slicked with sweat and she pushed up against him harder and faster, clawing his back as they both panted like thirsty desert dogs. He stopped for a moment; holding her on the brink for a moment before he released his sticky seminal fluid inside her gasping her name. Moments later she felt a trickle of fluid from inside herself.

"Oh Richard, oh my darling," she cried out.

She had discarded the camisole in the heat of their passion and now lay naked in his arms. For a moment neither of them spoke as their breath was quite gone.

"You look ravishing, Mrs Clarkson," he breathed.

"You look gorgeous, Dr Clarkson and I thoroughly approve of your bedside manner,"

"That was the best second helping of dessert I ever had too," he winked.

Edith was very reluctant to leave Anthony that evening but felt hopeful that their clear the air talk had yielded the desired result; all she had to do was sell her family on the idea and let them know that his time she would not stand for them destroying things.

Anthony's chauffeur drove Edith home.

Matthew met her in the hallway near the library.

"How did it go?" he whispered.

"It was good; I really must thank your mother for inviting him,"

"Well I would imagine that Mrs and Dr Clarkson will be rather occupied for the next day or so," Matthew said, "So how was dinner with Sir Anthony,"

"It was wonderful Matthew," her eyes shone.

They had not realised that Violet was just the other side of the door and she had heard every word; she frowned deeply.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Richard sighed contentedly as he lay in Isobel's arms; she was so passionate and loving that he knew she had restored a part of him that had been missing.

"Oh Isobel my darling," he sighed, "you have no idea how contented and at peace I feel being here with you. From the moment you put your arms around me that morning I have felt more comforted and at peace than I have ever known. I never knew it was possible to love and be loved so much. Thank you," he kissed her.

"You're welcome my darling," Isobel trailed her fingertips down her husband's naked back and smiled as he trembled ever so slightly, " You make me so happy; you are a wonderful lover, a good husband and a dear friend. After Matthew's father died I never expected to love again so completely. You needed comfort that day and it was a privilege to provide it. I'm grateful actually because it finally enabled me to admit that I had loved and needed you for a long time before,"

"I need you too, Isobel, and I know now that I have always loved you; I wish I had not wasted so much time,"

She rubbed his arm.

"We are together now Richard; what we need to think about is our future together as man and wife."

They kissed tenderly.

"You are a wonderful lover Richard,"

"You're not so bad yourself Mrs Clarkson," he trembled, "God the sight of you in that black silk and lace last night was enough to give a weaker man a heart-attack,"

"I'm glad you liked it," Isobel cuddled her husband and whispered huskily in his ear.

"Richard darling; I suddenly feel an overwhelming urge for you to make love to me,"

"It's very strange you mention that, Mrs Clarkson," he guided her hand to feel his hard throbbing erection, "I would not mind either. Come here." and he began to caress her neck and shoulder with his mouth.

Unaware that their conversation had been overheard Matthew and Edith went their separate ways; Matthew to Tom's room to see if he could coax him into a game of billiards and Edith into the library.

"Hello Edith dear," Violet said.

"Hello Granny," Edith said brightly although she hoped that her elation on seeing Anthony again was not immediately obvious.

"Did you have a nice day?" Cora asked.

"Yes although I could not find one single thing I wanted,"

"Never mind," Cora said.

"If you don't mind I am going to bed," Edith said, "I'm rather tired from wandering around,"

"Of course," Robert said.

Edith lay in bed; blissfully happy that things seemed rosier. For so long now Anthony had been her last thought before sleeping and her first upon waking. She had had no idea or expectation of ever seeing him again. She took out the one photo she possessed of him and kissed it before putting it under her pillow. She still had the clean handkerchief he had given her at dinner; damp with her tears but smelling faintly of his cologne. It was the only personal item of his she possessed so she kissed it and put it under her pillow.

"You mean Dr Clarkson and Cousin Isobel have married?" Robert was incredulous.

"It seems that way," Violet said.

"Well who would have thought it," Robert said.

"She's been after him for years Robert," Cora said, "the way those two argue can't mean anything other than underlying attraction,"

"The other thing is not so good though," Violet said, "because it means that once again we have to debate the Strallan issue."

"I think we should leave them be," Cora said, "Yes he may be older than what we want for her but he is titled, has more than adequate means to provide for her and let's face it, he copes adequately with his injury. If he is what Edith wants and he makes her happy then I am not prepared to stand in her way a second time; not that _I_ raised any objections last time round," the barb in her tone and emphasis on the word I made her meaning abruptly clear.

"Well from what Mama overheard they have only met," Robert said, "One meeting does not a betrothal make and we need to be careful; Edith is not stupid and his name has not been mentioned in this house from that day until now so if we start dropping his name she will smell a large rat. We will wait and see what happens and that includes you Mama, his name is not to be mentioned unless Edith mentions it."

"You really can't want this for her, Robert," Violet was aghast.

"All we want is for our daughters to be happy," Robert said, "Edith may put on a brave face and make out she doesn't care but she does; at unguarded moments I see real pain in her eyes. Mary and Matthew got together after more false starts than a snail race but they got there."

"Well I would say getting jilted is a pretty major false start," Violet said coldly.

"It was not you he jilted Mama," Robert said, "if Edith can forgive that then there is a real chance and I think Cora is right. Edith has suffered on account of our interference. I was blind to the fact that he did make her happy,"

"Do you think she loves him?" Violet turned to Cora.

"Yes, for what it's worth, I think she does and I think he did what he did that day because he loves her, not because he doesn't."

"Alright we will say nothing for now," Violet said, "but I am not happy about it; not happy at all,"

"Your displeasure is duly noted," Cora said icily.

"Are you feeling better?" Matthew asked as he slipped into bed beside Mary that night. He had made his own decision not to mention Anthony to Mary either although he was unaware that he had been overheard talking to Edith.

"Yes much better thank you," Mary nestled close to him, "I feel bad for missing your mother's wedding but I am sure she understood,"

"She was disappointed of course," Matthew said, "But she and Clarkson are happy now and I suspect they will be too absorbed in each other for anything else to matter for a day or so,"

"How is Tom?"

"Taking it one day at a time," Matthew said, "I managed to coax him to play billiards for an hour or so; I am no expert but I think he may be depressed although that is no surprise given the circumstances. When my father died my mother was pretty low,"

"I can only imagine," Mary said.

Edith found it hard to contain her enthusiasm at breakfast the next day but since she was never normally noticed that helped a lot. She announced she was going for a drive.

She had no idea that her father interpreted her intentions as a visit to Locksley.

Anthony was drinking tea when his butler came into the library.

"Lady Edith Crawley is here to see you Sir,"

"Splendid," Anthony said, "please bring a second cup,"

"Very good sir," the butler left.

Edith walked in.

"Hello Anthony darling,"

He was beside her in moments holding her closer to his warm body with his good arm.

"My darling; I thought yesterday was just a beautiful dream,"

"It was real," she looked into his blue eyes in a way that made him shiver.

They sat and tea was brought for Edith.

When they had finished Anthony got up and dropped to one knee in front of Edith, taking her hand in his good one.

"Lady Edith Crawley, I love you with all my heart and more fool me for daring to believe I could live without you. Will you do me the honour of consenting to be my wife?"

Edith threw her arms around him and kissed him.

"Was that a yes?" he teased.

"It was a hundred thousand times yes Anthony my darling," she held him tight, "and this time we will take our time and go at the pace you are comfortable with,"

"Now that, " he said, "sounds ideal to me and what would be more ideal would be if you consented to spend the day with me."

Edith held his good hand in both of hers and smiled at him, tears welling up in her brown eyes.

"Anthony, I would love to,"


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Isobel stirred as the bright sunlight penetrated the hotel curtains. She smiled as she looked at Richard, her beloved husband, sleeping in her arms and she felt such love for him but the intensity of her feelings no longer frightened her. He was absolutely everything she could ever want or need and she could not remember when she had last been so happy.

Richard stirred and smiled at her.

"Good morning Mrs Clarkson," he said

"Good morning Dr Clarkson," she kissed him, "It feels wonderful waking up with a husband,"

"It feels wonderful waking up with a wife too; it's something I never thought would happen to me. I had offers over the years of course but I am so glad I waited for you, my beloved beautiful Isobel,"

"I'm glad you waited too because I am just so very happy being married to such a compassionate gorgeous dashing doctor with an accent to die for," she looked into his eyes and gently stroked his cheek, "You look years younger,"

"I _feel_ years younger Isobel,"

They took a shower together; soaping every inch of each other's bodies as the hot water beat a tattoo on their naked flesh. Isobel held him tightly under the water and his hands caressed her back and buttocks as he kissed her passionately.

They dressed and went down for breakfast. They held hands across the table and Isobel smiled as she saw the bright light in her husband's eyes. God she loved him so much and just knowing he loved her made waking up in the morning worthwhile. To him she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen and how he had hoped; the knowledge that she was now his wife was a fact he would enjoy coming to terms with. For so long now Dr Richard Clarkson had lived for medicine and little else; the fact he now had a life beyond that would certainly take some acclimatising to but he looked forward to being a husband and setting up home with Isobel. They had agreed that he would move into Crawley House and the next couple of days would be spent transferring his personal effects. Someone had once told him that true love was medicine for the soul and well-being and he had scoffed but now he realised the full truth of it. Isobel had taken years off him and he felt like a new man with new dreams and hopes. Medicine would still be important to him, since he had studied and worked two jobs to pay his way through medical school, but it would no longer be the be all and end all for him.

He drove them back to Crawley House.

The day was spent productively moving his essential personal effects across but by evening all was established and they sat down with some trepidation to a meal cooked by Ethel.

"I wonder how Edith and Sir Anthony got on," Isobel said.

"Who knows?" he shrugged, "Maybe we should invite them for tea tomorrow?"

"That would be rather nice," Isobel said, "I will do that,"

"Best not to let Lord Grantham know that the invitation is extended to Sir Anthony as well,"

"Don't worry; they will probably be getting over the shock that we're married," Isobel held his hand in hers, "I love you so much Richard darling,"

"I love you too Mrs Clarkson," he kissed her hand.

Anthony went upstairs and brought down a tiny box. Edith sat with anticipation as he opened it to reveal a solitaire diamond white gold ring.

"It was Maud's," he explained, "but I can get you another if you would sooner not wear a dead woman's ring,"

"It's fine," she whispered, "I would be honoured to wear it my darling because she loved you too,"

He slipped it onto her finger and handed her the box.

"Best not wear it at home for the time being," he said, "give it a month or so before we spring that on them,"

"That's a good idea," she said.

"May I kiss you Edith? Properly I mean because I want to take your breath away,"

"Please do because I have waited a lifetime for such a kiss,"

Edith did not count being kissed by Farmer Drake because he had been married.

She got to her feet and he drew her to him as she put her arms around his warm muscular body trying to stop herself from trembling.

His mouth claimed hers as he began to caress and explore her mouth and throat with his. Edith kissed him back; giving into her long thwarted desire as she felt her erect nipples strain against her dress. Her dreams of being held and kissed by this unspeakably gorgeous man were coming true but she knew she had to contain her ultimate desire to be his lover. She was determined to be a virgin bride.

When the kiss broke Anthony was trembling as much as she was and they sat down; suddenly weakened by the emotion.

"Oh Edith," he murmured, "That was the most loving and passionate kiss I have ever known or given. Thank you,"

"Thank you for making my dreams come true," she whispered.

She left Locksley late afternoon with great reluctance but promised to take him out for a drive the next day.

Violet was mercifully absent that evening as Edith felt it might be difficult to contain her elation. She smiled as she dressed for dinner; remembering the sensual feel of Anthony's mouth on hers.

Isobel and Richard were present though and Edith sensed some awkwardness on her parents' part which she sensed was more due to the way Clarkson had been treated with regard to Sybil than the fact he and Isobel were now married.

Isobel caught up with Edith in the library before Cora and Mary came through.

"How are things Edith dear?"

"They are wonderful Cousin Isobel," Edith's smile was infectious.

"Richard and I were wondering if you and Sir Anthony would care to join us for afternoon tea tomorrow."

"I would like that; I am going to take him for a drive tomorrow so can ask him then."

"You really do love him don't you?"

"Yes I do," she whispered, "he loves me too Cousin Isobel and because he loves me he tried to set me free but he has realised he needs me just as much as I need him,"

"I understand that feeling Edith dear," Isobel smiled brightly, "Richard has made me very happy indeed; happier than maybe I have a right to be,"

"I'm really pleased for you cousin Isobel," Edith said.

They changed topic as Mary and Cora came in closely followed by Robert, Tom, Matthew and Dr Clarkson.

Edith smiled as she thought of the engagement ring locked in her jewellery box; hardly able to wait for the day when she could wear it publicly.

The following day she went to Locksley and, after coffee, they were soon speeding happily along the country lanes in the way they had done in those halcyon days before the war.

"I would be delighted to come to tea at Mrs Crawley...sorry Mrs's Clarkson's," he said.

"Oh Anthony, I really do love you,"

"I love you too Edith," he murmured, "We can trust the Clarkson's with our secret can't we?"

"Yes," she said.

Ethel let Edith and Anthony into the sitting room at Crawley House and went to fetch the tea.

They sat and drank tea.

"We're delighted you could come," Isobel said.

"It's nice to be invited," Anthony said, "A lot of my so called friends ditched me after I jilted Edith so I don't get many invites these days."

"Some people can be petty," Isobel said.

"I know," Edith said, "I was the one jilted not them and if I can forgive..."

Anthony took her hand in his good one.

"Actually we have an announcement," Anthony said, "But it needs to be kept quiet for a while; yesterday Edith agreed to be my wife and I asked her properly this time."

"Congratulations," Richard put an arm around Isobel, "I can certainly recommend it because Isobel has taken years off me,"

"It shows," Anthony smiled.

"We're taking it at Anthony's pace this time," Edith said, "I know I kind of railroaded him last time so when he feels ready, and only then, will we make it public,"

"Have you had any nightmares recently Anthony?" Richard asked. Anthony shook his head.

"Strangely enough no; not since I saw Edith again,"

"That's good to hear; many years ago I was told that true love was the best medicine for soul and well being. I scoffed at the time but it is true,"

"It certainly is," Isobel said.

Edith drove Anthony home and kissed him goodbye, a long lingering kiss that left them both trembling. Then she returned to Downton for dinner knowing that absolutely nothing would spoil her mood that evening.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

**Five weeks later.**

Edith & Anthony were sitting in his library playing checkers; Edith was losing but she did not mind because she appreciated the fact Anthony did not insult her intelligence by letting her win. Outside it was raining heavily.

"We really ought to think about telling your parents soon, you know," he said.

Edith sighed, "Yes I know but I'm not looking forward to it."

He placed his hand over hers.

"I won't let them bully me this time my darling, I promise," he looked into her eyes, "I think their problem was that they equated my injury with poor health in other respects but I saw Dr Clarkson last week and I am in sound physical health; heart lungs liver etc functioning fine. So I won't be dropping dead any time soon,"

"I'm glad to hear it," Edith said.

"I asked Dr & Mrs Clarkson to drop by for tea; we can discuss tactics. Your father already knows the cost of ignoring the medical opinion of the one doctor who really knows the patient."

"Normally I would say that telling one's parents you're getting married shouldn't be a military operation but given our previous experience any help and moral support would be greatly appreciated," Edith pressed his good hand to her mouth and kissed it.

."I love you Anthony,"

"I love you too my darling; why is why I don't intend letting anything spoil things this time. You have given me so much confidence."

The butler came in,

"Dr & Mrs Clarkson are here to see you Sir, Lady Edith"

"Splendid, send them in and bring some more tea,"

Richard and Isobel walked in. Anthony asked them to sit; moments later tea was brought and poured.

"You look so happy," Isobel gushed.

"We are," Anthony said, "I made the biggest mistake of my life that day and I am thankful Edith has been good enough to forgive my sins."

Richard sipped his tea.

"The fact is that I am now ready to go public and we would value your moral support," Anthony said, he turned to Richard, "and your medical assertion that I am not liable to drop dead from a heart-attack on account of my injury,"

"Of course Sir Anthony," Richard said, "other than the obvious physical injury you will live forever."

"I wouldn't want to," Anthony shivered, "but I thank you for that anyway,"

"We just want you both to be present when we tell my parents and Granny," Edith said, "I have not mentioned Anthony to them and they have not mentioned his name since that day so I think the element of shock will be on our side this time although I think Granny suspects something because she keeps looking at me as if she expects me to make a sudden verbal _faux pas_ and spill my guts."

"We have been invited for dinner on Saturday," Isobel said, "then might be a good time,"

"I agree," Anthony said, "Edith darling, bring your ring that day,"

"Of course I will; it's so wasted sitting in my jewellery box when it should be an outward sign of our love,"

They talked some more and the consensus was that Richard & Isobel should go to Downton in the early evening an hour or so before dinner and get settled. Edith and Anthony would arrive about twenty minutes later and walk right in to drop their bombshell.

"The boring old objections should keep them busy until dinner," Anthony said, "But I don't intend letting them bully me this time because I know what I want having had to live without her. This time round her forgiveness and knowing that she loves me gives me confidence beyond measure,"

Edith kissed him on the cheek.

"I am so proud of you," she breathed.

"Hear hear!" Isobel said.

"Dr Clarkson I would be deeply honoured if you would be my Best Man," Anthony said.

"I would be honoured," Richard said.

"And I want you as my Matron of Honour," Edith said to Isobel.

"I would be delighted my dear; I really would,"

"The wedding will be a couple of months after we go public," Anthony said, "I know Edith has already arranged a wedding in a month so two months will be easy; we want to keep it small."

"Best way," Isobel said

"I just wish Sybil was still here," Edith said.

"No one wishes that more than I, Lady Edith," Richard said.

Saturday dawned dry but overcast. After lunch Edith drove over to Locksley to spend the afternoon with Anthony. As soon as she was clear of Downton she slipped on her engagement ring happy in the knowledge that she would never again need to take it off.

Anthony was pleased to see her and drew her close to him. He smelt gorgeous; his cologne made her light-headed. She melted into him.

"I'm terribly nervous," he whispered, "but your love has given me a confidence I had never known before."

"It will be fine, my love. Remember that we have Cousin Isobel and Dr Clarkson on our side this time."

"I know," he sighed, "Oh Edith, I love you so much,"

"I love you too; would you do me a favour?"

"If I can,"

"Would you have a talk with Tom? Matthew, Mary and I have tried but it is difficult because we have not been where he is."

"It is a long process but if I can make him feel any better than I shall certainly try. No doubt he has been fed the platitudes that it does get easier."

"He will believe that if it comes from you; I am quite worried about him,"

"I will do what I can, my darling."

"Thank you," she kissed him, "I can relate to how he feels in a way; he has never really fitted in at Downton either and I was born there,"

Anthony drew her close to him. She did not really talk about how she felt about her life although he knew she had always been on the edge of things.

"You will never be second best here, Edith," he murmured.

"Dr & Mrs Clarkson are here, my lord," Carson announced.

Isobel and Richard walked in, hand in hand. Isobel knew that Edith was fetching Anthony and she was filled with nervous trepidation. Richard squeezed her hand in reassurance and she smiled at him.

Anthony was trembling slightly as he got out of the car at Downton.

"It will be alright," she soothed.

Carson had nipped down to the Servant's hall leaving the field clear for Edith & Anthony to walk in to the library unannounced. Violet's jaw dropped.

"I rather hoped I had seen the last of you, Sir Anthony," she said icily.

"Hopes are like snowflakes, Lady Grantham. They are all delicately unique and quick to dissolve into nothing."

Edith thought this was beautifully poetic.

"What do you mean by bringing Sir Anthony here, Edith?" Robert asked a frown contorting his features, "please don't tell me you have married in secret and are with child?"

"Not yet," Edith said with an edge of "but I just might" in her voice.

"Lord Grantham I did what I thought was right by your daughter that day; set her free to find a more suitable husband, but I made a choice for her I had no right to make and I have suffered since. Mrs Clarkson was kind enough to invite me to her wedding. Edith has forgiven me and hers is the only forgiveness I need. Edith & I love each other. The words were never spoken before but they have been now and Edith's love gives me confidence. I know I am older than any of us, including Edith, may like but I can neither deny nor change that. Yes I have a duff arm but that does not mean my health is poor in other respects."

"That's true Lord Grantham," Clarkson said, "I gave Sir Anthony a full medical examination last week at his request and he is in perfect health; all vital organs working as they should. He is no more likely to drop dead of a sudden heart attack than anyone else in this household."

There was a brief silence while Robert and Violet considered this.

"You already know the cost of ignoring the medical advice of the doctor who truly knows the patient," Anthony said, "I was truly sorry to learn of Lady Sybil's untimely death which could, to all intents and purposes, have been prevented,"

Edith wondered what had happened; where had her beloved's fragile self esteem gone. She found this bolder Anthony even more attractive. She was fiercely proud of him.

Robert was scarlet; his hands shook with rage. Cora put a restraining hand on his shoulder but he slapped it off angrily.

"How dare you," Robert bellowed, "Get out of my house this instant!"

"If Anthony goes I go," Edith said struggling to keep her voice steady, "if you want to lose another daughter you have been going the right way about it for some time now but since it has never been a secret that Mary is your favourite then there would be no real loss. I am invisible here; the reliable spinster daughter you want to take care of you in your old age but that is not what I want. Anthony allows me to be myself and he loves me for me; his servants respect me and I am never made to feel second best. Downton may be where I reside but it has never been my home for I have never felt loved."

Anthony was very proud of her and at that moment he loved her more than he had ever thought possible.

Cora was crying, "But Edith darling; we do love you and want only the best for you,"

"Then let her be happy," Tom spoke up, "Lord Grantham, whether you choose to admit it or not, you know Lady Edith will never be happy with anyone else while Sir Anthony draws breath and, from what Dr Clarkson says, he won't stop doing that for a good few years yet. I have the lost the woman I loved more than life itself. Anthony lost a wife he loved so don't let him lose Lady Edith a second time. If you want to lose another daughter you are going the right way about it."

Robert had gone from scarlet to ashen.

"No of course I don't want to lose you, Edith my darling. You are my daughter and I love you but I never took the time to get to know you and ask what you really wanted and I am sorry for that,"

"I understand Papa but surely a father must learn to share his daughter's love? I love Anthony and I always have but I want to marry him with your blessing."

"Of course," Robert embraced Edith, "I am truly sorry and I know he will look after you," He offered his hand to Anthony who shook it warmly, "are you sure this is what you want?"

"It's all I have ever wanted; to be Lady Strallan, Mistress of Locksley," Edith said, "Anthony has asked me to marry him properly; that never happened last time, and I was glad to accept. I made the mistake of trying to pressure Anthony last time but he has forgiven me that too,"

Mary spoke, "I'm sorry too Edith; I didn't want to admit my little sister had grown up and fallen in love. I don't think we can ever be friends but I promise to try to get along better if you will,"

"That is all I ever wanted," the two sisters embraced.

"You seem a different person, Sir Anthony," Violet said,

"Edith's love gives me confidence Lady Grantham," Anthony smiled.

Dinner was a convivial meal after the drama of the evening and Edith was pleased to see how relaxed Anthony seemed.

The ladies filed through before the gentlemen. They went to the library where Carson was serving coffee.

"Well done my dear," Isobel said, embracing Edith warmly, "I don't think you will have any trouble now,"

"I'm so proud of him, cousin Isobel," Edith blinked tears from her eyes.

"Then mind you tell him," Isobel said.

"I certainly will," Edith smiled.

"So how are things?" Anthony asked Tom quietly.

""It's very difficult, Sir Anthony. When I'm alone I can't stop crying, Mary, Edith and Matthew have been good but they can't understand, not really."

"No one can understand unless they have been there, Tom," Anthony said gently, "It really does get easier with time and you have the baby which must be a comfort, I never got to hold my son, they took him away straight after and I think it would really have helped me to do so. I fell apart after Maud died; my sister had to come from London to do all the official business because I just could not face it."

"I understand that," Tom sighed, "Lord Grantham and Mr Murray dealt with all that for me."

Anthony put a hand on Tom's shoulder.

"If you ever want to talk then you are welcome to come to Locksley; it helps to talk to someone who understands."

"Thank you Sir Anthony; I think it will help a lot."

Edith and Anthony were outside waiting for his chauffeur. It was a warm evening. They held each other tightly and Edith smiled as her ring glinted in the moonlight.

"I was so proud of you tonight," she whispered

"I was proud of you too my darling," they shared a lingering tender kiss and Edith felt herself trembling.

He looked into her eyes.

"Edith, I have wasted so much time. I want us to get married as soon as is humanly possible."

"I would like that," she murmured.

"We'll talk about it tomorrow," he promised as his chauffeur got out of the car and opened the door for his master, "I did talk to Tom and let him know I would be there if he wanted to talk; although I'll be an old married man again before too long,"

"You're not old my darling, just mature and all the more gorgeous for it."

"I was rather proud of Edith tonight," Isobel said as she and Richard got into bed.

"She certainly seems to have given Anthony a lot of confidence," Richard replied as he pulled her close to him, "I think it was young Tom who saved the day though,"

"Yes and he certainly spoke the truth," Isobel said, "None of them would have admitted that they knew how Edith and Anthony felt about each other because it did not suit their purpose; I'm rather proud of you too as it happens,"

"Isobel my darling," he kissed her, "Why did it take me so long to admit that I would never find happiness with anyone while you drew breath?"

"I think we have made up for it since," Isobel said as she whispered huskily in his ear.

"Will you make love to me Richard my darling?"

Anthony felt relaxed and content as he got into bed that night. He had his beloved Lady Edith and they were to be married without any interference from her family which is better than he could have hoped for. He felt for Tom and made up his mind to do whatever he could to help the young Irishman through his grief. Anthony hoped Tom would one day find new love as he had been privileged to do.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

**Two months later.**

It was the eve of Edith & Anthony's wedding and she was having tea at Locksley before they parted in accordance with bridal tradition. It had been agreed that Dr Clarkson would stay the night at Locksley and Isobel at Downton. They were waiting for them to arrive.

She sat next to him on the couch in the library; Anthony had his good arm around her and her head rested on his shoulder.

"Are you happy Anthony my darling?"

"Yes but nowhere near as happy as I will be this time tomorrow," he smiled, "Are you?"

"Yes,"

"Good and I will keep you happy."

"Where did the hopes and snowflakes quotation you said to Granny come from?"

"To be honest I have no idea, I just came out with it. Did you like it?"

"Yes, it was beautifully poetic."

They shared a lingering tender kiss. Anthony no longer had doubts that she would want to share his bed; those had dissolved into nothing in the heat of their first ever kiss. He was anxious how she would react to the scarring and bullet wound on his shoulder but she had assured him that she would love and accept it as part of him. She looked forward to sharing his bed as his wife but she was slightly apprehensive although she knew he would not hurt her. This time round they had been open and honest about any concerns and their frank discussion helped Anthony relax as he realised he had nothing to worry about as she had lovingly dispelled any fears.

"Tomorrow night will be special for us both my darling," he assured her, "I want to take my time and make it beautiful."

"It will be my love," she held him close; "I have waited so long for you to make me yours."

Richard and Isobel arrived soon after so Edith kissed Anthony gently.

"Don't worry about tomorrow my love," he murmured, "I will not be going anywhere unless you are beside me as my wife,"

Edith & Isobel drove back to Downton.

"Are you ready?" Isobel asked.

"I have been ready for this day for longer than I care to imagine Cousin Isobel,"

"This is the first night Richard and I have spent apart since the day Sybil died; it will be rather strange,"

"How long have you loved him cousin Isobel?"

"I think since the moment I met him, I was certainly attracted to him then, but it took me a long while as I did not admit it to myself until he sobbed in my arms and I held him. It is very special when you find love like that and I would not be without him now. He is my best friend, lover and husband."

"Anthony is probably my best friend just because he lets me be myself and loves me for it,"

"He is a lovely man, Edith, and I know he won't let you down this time."

"I know that too; I was just so proud of him the day we went public. If only I had told him I loved him last time instead of going on about how the injury did not matter,"

"You live and learn my dear; but your family accept him now and Tom was singing his praises earlier saying how good it was to have someone to talk to who knows what he's going through."

"That was all I ever wanted; for them to accept that I loved him but that day no one asked me how I felt about him, about what happened. From then on his name was not mentioned and it was like it never happened. Can you imagine how that felt cousin Isobel? No one wanted to talk to me about it. But now I have him back I won't lose him again. I'm just a bit worried about tomorrow night although he says he intends to make it special for me. In truth I'm so hungry for that Cousin Isobel; to be touched by him and held all night. It sends shivers through me. I think he's still worried I will recoil when I see his scars but I know I won't because they are a part of him,"

"You need to be extra loving when you touch him there Edith; he may not be able to feel it all but he will know that you aren't afraid by the way you react to it. Obviously I have not seen the scarring but Richard has; if you are really concerned ask him about it after the wedding. He can't refuse to discuss it with Sir Anthony's wife,"

"You and Dr Clarkson have been so good to us," Edith said, "If you hadn't invited him to your wedding we would not be having this conversation now,"

"Well I had no guarantee he would accept,"

"I know but the fact is you took the chance for me, for us both and I can never thank you enough for that,"

"You can thank me by being a beautiful bride and by being happy," Isobel said, "as for tomorrow night just trust your instincts and go with that,"

Richard and Anthony were drinking whisky. It was early evening.

"You'll be alright Anthony," Richard said, "She loves you more than life itself and I know that because I feel the same way about Isobel,"

"So how did you and Isobel get together?"

Richard sighed, "The morning that Lady Sybil died I felt distraught because I am certain I could have saved her had I been listened to. I needed someone to talk to and I went to Isobel. I was tormented by false guilt and I ended up sobbing in her arms. For a few weeks before I had caught myself thinking about her a lot; imagining her mouth on mine that sort of thing and in her arms I found a peace I had never known before. I think I have always loved her. Our first night together I just slept and she just lay there and held me, kept me company."

"I wish I had had Edith when I first came back from the war; I have not had a single nightmare since I saw her again. I have found a peace I never expected to know and I will be with her always. I can't lose her again and I know I am ready to take that step now."

"You will be happy, Sir Anthony; Lady Edith is a fine woman who knows exactly what she wants and needs,"

"I half long for tomorrow night and half fear it because it has been far too long since I made love to a woman and it has to be special because it's her first time and will colour her view for life,"

"Just relax and take your time; she will need to learn to undress you after all. Trust your natural instincts and you will be fine," Richard drained the dregs of his whisky, "you ought to get some rest now," he advised, "you will probably not get much, if any, sleep tomorrow night," he winked.

"I do hope that's the case," Anthony winked back.

The next morning was a hive of activity. Edith took a bath and Anna helped her on with her wedding dress.

"You look beautiful my lady," she gasped.

"I feel it too; but I have been here before," Edith swallowed.

Robert came in.

"You look beautiful," he said as he shooed Anna, Mary and Isobel out of the room.

Alone with her father Edith relaxed.

"You look beautiful Edith and I am sorrier than I can say that I never saw your true beauty or worth before now. Anthony did and I am sorry I never gave him credit for that. I know that you will be happy,"

"I know we will Papa," Edith hugged herself, "I love him so much,"

"I know you always have but your grandmother and I did not want to see it. I really am sorry,"

"It's forgotten Papa," Edith hugged him, "I only wish Sybil was here; she would be delighted,"

"She is here in spirit, Edith; I know she is watching out for Tom and the little one,"

."I hope so," Edith said.

They went downstairs. Tom stood at the foot.

"Will I do Tom?" Edith asked.

"Very nicely Lady Edith; I wish you both all the love and happiness in the world."

"Thank you Tom," Edith smiled as Robert led her out to the car.

Anthony waited in the church; Dr Clarkson beside him. He was nervous, his pulse was racing, but he knew it would be alright this time.

Clarkson put his hand on Anthony's arm.

"You'll be fine,"

The organ began to play and Anthony looked as his bride came up the aisle on her father's arm. She almost glided in her cream satin dress and when she reached the front she whispered, "Anthony, I really do love you,"

"I really love you too," he whispered back, so happy he thought his heart would burst.

"Dearly beloved," Travis began.

This time it went flawlessly. Edith and Anthony spoke their vows never once taking their eyes off each other. Both Violet and Isobel dabbed at their eyes with handkerchiefs.

Clarkson held Edith's hand to enable Anthony to slip the ring onto her finger as Anthony's injury prevented him from being able to do both.

"With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship and all my worldly goods I thee endow," he said, his voice ringing out clearly in the high ceilinged stone church.

Travis pronounced them to be man and wife and Lady Edith Strallan walked out of the church with her husband's good arm around her waist.

The wedding breakfast was riotously happy; everyone was relaxed and content.

They had posed for photographs but Edith knew none of them would do justice to her husband's beautiful blue eyes.

At last the car came to take them to Locksley where they would be spending the night before embarking on their honeymoon the following day.

"Don't be strangers," Violet said.

"We won't Granny," Edith said.

"I am sorry I misjudged you Sir Anthony," Violet offered him her hand, "I am not good at admitting when I am wrong but on this occasion I was. Now I want you to look after Edith and give her children,"

"That's all part of the plan Lady Grantham," Anthony smiled.

Edith hugged Isobel and Richard,

"Thank you," she breathed, "for everything,"

"You're welcome, Lady Edith," Richard said with a smile, "I have a feeling Lady Sybil is here in spirit,"

"Yes I think so too," Edith smiled.

They settled in the back of the car and were driven to Locksley. Anthony bodily lifted Edith with his left arm and stepped over the threshold.

"Welcome home Lady Strallan," he said with tears in his eyes, "you have no idea how long I have waited to say that,"

"Oh Anthony darling; I am totally drunk on happiness and love right now,"

"So am I, my love," he murmured.

They went into the library which had been decorated by vases of bright coloured sweet-smelling flowers. Anthony had given the servants the night off so he could have Edith all to himself. Brandy and wine was set on the table with glasses as well as some small plates of snacks which the housekeeper had laid out.

"Oh Anthony, it looks beautiful," she said.

"Only the best for my Lady Strallan," he said.

They sat and had a drink as Edith nestled close to her husband; life really could not be better than this.

Later on he took her hand and led her upstairs to his bedchamber which was decorated with flowers and lit by candles.

"I'm nervous," she whispered, "I want so much to please and satisfy you but I know nothing about how to,"

"Take your time my darling Edith; we have all the time in the world now we are finally married and I will teach you everything you could ever need to know,"


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

"I was told to trust my natural instincts," Edith murmured.

"So what do your natural instincts suggest you do now, Lady Strallan," he whispered into her coppery hair. He was holding her close to his warm muscular body.

She kissed him, "This," she whispered.

She gently supported his injured arm while carefully removing the sling. She then grappled to unbutton his shirt feeling like she was on a strange road in fog without a map but in the end she managed it and stood wide-eyed taking in his broad muscular chest with its smattering of dark blonde hair. She very gently removed his shirt and stood for a moment; drinking in every detail of him.

"Are you alright Edith?" he asked gently.

"Yes, I've never, well I have never seen a half naked man before."

She pressed close; her hands roaming across his shoulders and down his back while her mouth caressed his chest, her tongue swirling around his erect nipples as she sucked gently.

"Oh Edith," he moaned softly.

Her fingers caressed the scars on his shoulder but he could not feel it. Realising this she whispered, "Please let me see, Anthony; I promise I won't recoil in horror because those scars are a testament to your courage and a part of the husband I love,"

He turned his back and she saw the dark scars on his pale skin including the jagged crudely stitched tear where the bullet had entered.

"I'm going to kiss you there," she whispered, "I know you won't feel it but I want you to know."

"Thank you my darling sweet Lady Strallan," he said as tears came to his eyes.

Edith's mouth and fingers gently caressed his scars and he almost wept. He could feel more than he realised and every touch told him "I love you, all of you,"

"Anthony," she whispered, "I'm so in awe of your bravery and I love you all the more now I have seen it,"

She went back in front and held him close as he kissed her hard enough to take her breath away and she gave everything she had back to him with her voracious desire.

She undressed him; gazing in awe at his long supple muscular legs and his arousal which she longed to feel inside her.

"Oh Anthony, you really are gorgeous but I never realised just how much until now."

.He lay on the bed.

Edith slid her wedding dress off her shoulders and allowed it to slide down her body; revealing slender curvaceous hips, small pert breasts and toned thighs. Her skin was creamy in colour and a small patch of coppery hair covered her sex. He gasped as he took her in.

"My god Lady Strallan; do you realise just how beautiful you truly are?" tears filled his eyes.

She joined him in bed and began to kiss and nuzzle him causing him to groan softly as her mouth caressed the hollow of his neck.

"Oh god, Edith," he murmured, "I like your natural instinct because this is the most erotic experience I have ever known,"

She held him tightly and he whispered, "Lie back so I can succumb to my natural instinct,"

His mouth began to caress her breasts; his tongue swirling round her erect nipples and down her cleavage while he kissed licked and sucked gently. She trembled.

"Oh Anthony darling,"

His mouth descended to her sex as his tongue ran along her slit, parting her labia and hooking her engorged clitoris free from its hiding place. She was already deliciously moist but he wanted to be absolutely sure she was ready so he did not hurt her. He began to suck on her clitoris and gently nibbled her labia sending violent shivers through her.

"Anthony," she moaned as he continued to pleasure her. Edith had only read about the sensations he was delivering in books her grandmother would have a fit to catch her reading. The reality surpassed her fevered erotic daydreams one hundredfold. Waves of pleasure washed over her and she closed her eyes. She could smell the burning candles and flowers pervaded with his highly masculine scent of shaving soap and cologne. She gasped as a stream of sticky wetness gushed from inside her and she felt him drink like a man who had just found a watering hole after long wanderings in the desert. The sensation was so exquisite that the beauty made her cry. Being here with him like this was better than she had ever dreamt it could be because she felt like the centre of his world which indeed she was. She felt like every fibre and never ending was on fire and aching for him but she liked the notion that he was prolonging it for as long as he could. At last she could wait no more

"Anthony, make love to me," she begged him, "I need you inside me,"

He moved back up her body and kissed her before slipping inside her. She felt no pain at all and was quickly aware of his deep steady strokes caressing her private space.

She put her arms around his neck and kissed him hard.

An hour or so later they were slicked with sweat and he released a stream of sticky seminal fluid inside her.

"Edith," he gasped as he took her into the crook of his good arm. She could feel him trembling and saw his eyes filled with tears.

"Anthony, that was so beautiful,"

"Thank you my darling," he whispered, "my beloved Lady Strallan. I just can't believe that finally we belong to each other,"

"We always did in our hearts," she whispered, "and now natural instinct has guided us the rest of the way,"

"I love you darling Lady Strallan," his fingertips caressed her spine lovingly and sensually.

Isobel shivered pleasantly as Richard undressed her and began nuzzling her neck and kissing her hungrily. They fell on the bed a tangle of limbs; hands and mouths ardently caressing.

"Show me how much you missed me last night," she dared, "I know you did because I missed you terribly."

He took her rough and hard just the way she had come to like it. Her nails clawed his back as she pushed up against him and began to moan softly.

"Oh god Richard," Isobel moaned," I love you so much,"

"I love you too," he panted like a thirsty desert dog as he released his stickiness inside her. He took her in his arms and she cuddled close to him. She was blissfully content lying here with her beloved husband and hoped that Edith was having a beautiful loving experience; not that she could imagine Anthony would be anything but loving and sensual.

"God I missed you last night Isobel," he murmured.

"That much was obvious Richard darling," her mouth caressed his bare shoulder and moved up to the hollow of his neck making him shiver.

"I think I was only existing before I became yours Isobel," he murmured, "You make me feel more alive than I ever thought was possible. Your love strengthens me and gives me comfort,"

"I feel the same way my darling; I never expected to find such complete love again after losing Reginald,"

"Was he good to you?"

"Yes he was; he was more practical than sensual but still I never had any complaints but I am sure I never knew what making love truly was until I was with you. He was, how shall we say, pretty functional and lacking imagination in that department but he cherished and provided for me and we got on well. I did love him Richard and not just because he was Matthew's father but I love you differently and with a considerably different passion," she looked into his eyes, "You are not jealous of a dead man are you Richard?"

"Of course not Isobel," But he was in a way because Reginald had been with Isobel when she was young enough to bear children. Richard had accepted over the years that fatherhood had passed him by but he had not minded so much until he had met Isobel. Still he now had a handsome, honest hard-working and decent step-son so all was not bad.

Isobel kissed Richard tenderly; her tongue exploring his mouth and he kissed her back holding her close to him.

"I hope Edith has had a pleasant first experience,"

"I can't imagine Anthony being anything but gentle and loving," Richard said, "he will make her every experience special simply because he loves her like I love you."

"Every time you make love to me is incredible, darling Richard," she whispered, "and you are rather gorgeous,"

"Thank you darling Isobel," he whispered and they drifted off to sleep their bodies entwined.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

**A/N: I thought it was time Clarkson got some kind of vindication so read on and enjoy.**

**Two months later**

It was the last evening of Edith & Anthony's honeymoon. They had been to Rome, Venice and Verona. Anthony had been surprised she wanted the same honeymoon as he had planned before but she had said "What better way to make a new start and exorcise the past,"

Now they were in their room lying on the bed. It was late evening; they had spent the last couple of hours making love and were now resting. They were slicked with sweat following their carnal exertions and the heat of the evening. Edith lay contentedly in the crook of his good arm and rested her coppery head on his broad shoulder. She had had to keep largely covered up owing to her creamy complexion but he had acquired a light tan which really intensified the blue of his eyes.

"You look like a real Adonis," she purred seductively, "and you make love with the tireless energy of a Roman god as well,"

"Thank you," Anthony gasped and smiled for she was always paying him heady compliments.

"You're welcome," she ran her fingers down his naked back caressing his scars as she did so, "Oh Anthony this last month has been like being in Heaven but I also look forward to being mistress of Locksley; my own domain,"

"You will be the perfect social hostess my love," he smiled at her. The bright light in his blue eyes the last few weeks had been a stark contrast to the way he had been those long months without her when he had not bothered to wash or shave and, in truth, not cared whether he lived or died. He had not spoken to her of those months; the stabbing ache of loneliness which graced his days and tormented his nights but decided he wanted to be totally honest with her.

He drew her close to him and she laid her arm across his chest.

"Edith my darling, you have given me back my life and made me happier than I deserve but I need to tell you something. You want to know me,"

"Yes my darling,"

"In those months following what I did that day I was a complete mess. I neglected myself, did not bother to wash or shave and in truth I could not care to eat either. Luckily my servants were champion and they ran the place like I was absent which I was in all but body, the dreams I got after the war tormented me by night and thoughts of what I had done, what I had thrown away, troubled me. More than once I felt like putting a gun to my own head but I had one hope that somehow I would find you again and earn your forgiveness; that hope kept my pulse racing. I deserved that torment then one day my butler brought the post amongst which was an invitation to Clarkson's wedding,"

Edith's brown eyes were filled with tears; she had gone through hell with no one to talk to but it seemed as nothing beside what he had endured.

"Oh Anthony my darling; I am so very sorry. I never wanted you to suffer because I know you did what you did out of love; not for lack of it. I forgave you that night and I never once hated you or stopped loving you; in fact I realised just how much I _do_ love you. I thought about coming to see you many times but feared being turned away or what would happen if my father found out. Your name was not spoken at Downton after that day, not until the evening when I took you home," she shivered as she propped herself up on one elbow to look into those beautiful blue eyes, "I think what we have now is all the more intense and beautiful because we suffered for it. If I had told you I loved you that day, before Travis spoke, would it have made any difference?"

"I like to think it would but I don't think we can ever know," he kissed her, "but I should have asked Travis if we could use the vestry; I never should have humiliated you in front of your family,"

"It's all forgiven my love and as we need to move on we shouldn't need to mention it again. I appreciate your honesty and I love you all the more for it."

"I quite agree my darling," he nuzzled her shoulder, "I just wanted to lay it to rest,"

"I understand," she snuggled up to him and kissed him on the lips.

"I really am so incredibly happy," he said, "I think I'm drunk with love for you,"

"You say the sweetest things," she said.

"Nothing less than you deserve and things I believe you have waited a lifetime to hear,"

"You're right there."

"Lady Strallan, I promise you that you will never be second best in my world and my servants respect you so we will run Locksley together on equal footing."

"Would you like a son or daughter?"

"I don't mind as long as the child is healthy and my wife survives the birth," he said, "What with what happened to Maud and to Lady Sybil I am a bundle of nerves,"

"Well I won't let Papa call in Sir Philip Tapsell," Edith said, "it will be Dr Clarkson only and he knows what he is doing,"

"I so want to give you my child," he murmured, "I will be so proud to see you with my baby in your arms,"

"I would love that," Edith said, "I can see a little blonde son in his father's image with enormous blue eyes,"

"I can see a little girl with coppery hair and puppy dog brown eyes," he said.

"Well one of us is guaranteed our wish," Edith said. She whispered in his ear, "Do you feel like doing a bit more to achieve that goal?"

"I certainly do my darling Lady Strallan," he murmured.

00

Richard lay in Isobel's arms; totally shattered after a very energetic bout of passion. His breathing was ragged and he was drenched in sweat but he was blissfully content. With Isobel beside him he knew he would never be lonely again and that he could accomplish anything. The only good thing to have come from Lady Sybil's death was that he now had Isobel to love and look after him.

"Sir Anthony and Edith get home later today," Isobel said. "I'm so glad I invited him to our wedding; those two were meant to be together, a bit like us really,"

"We could drive over to see them later this week," Richard kissed his wife tenderly, "but she will need to settle into her new home and new role,"

"She told me she can't wait for the first time that Carson announces them as Sir Anthony and Lady Strallan," Isobel said, "Do you think she's pregnant yet?"

"It's only been a month, Isobel; I won't be able to tell this early on but I expect they have put the groundwork in," he sighed, "Oh Isobel, I wish we had met years ago. It galls me I can't give you a child,"

"Well Lady Grantham got pregnant that time pretty late in life," Isobel said, "miracles can happen, although I'm not sure what Matthew would think to having a step brother or sister at his age,"

"I don't think it's likely," Richard sighed, "but I suppose I can hope."

"You would be a good father, Richard," Isobel said.

00

They showered and dressed before descending for breakfast. Ethel had moved on to be near her son, Charlie, so Mrs Bird, Isobel's former cook and housekeeper, was back in tandem,

Richard looked through the newspaper as he drank his coffee.

"My god," he exclaimed suddenly, "sometimes ones sins do find them out," he smiled brightly and pushed the paper over to Isobel, pointing out the relevant article with his teaspoon.

**EMINENT GYNAECOLOGIST TAPSELL TO BE STRUCK OFF FOLLOWING ENQUIRY**

_Eminent gynaecologist and obstetrician Sir Philip Tapsell is to be struck off the medical register following an enquiry into medical negligence and malpractice._

_Tapsell, 59, denies these allegations but closer examination of recent cases reveals cases where women unnecessarily died because Tapsell refused to accommodate the experience and knowledge of the patients' regular medical practitioners; many of whom had actually known the patients and in some cases delivered them. _

_The enquiry continues to investigate although the General Medical Council are more than satisfied that there can be only one outcome for Sir Philip Tapsell._

"That is wonderful, Richard," Isobel gasped, "We all know you did everything you could to make yourself heard but he messed with the wrong family this time."

Richard looked up to the ceiling.

"Maybe there is a God who cares about me after all," he said.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

**A/N: In reality I have no idea what nature an official complaint to the General Medical Council (GMC) against a doctor takes so I am somewhat inventive in this chapter. Mistakes are all mine.**

Tom was elated when he read about Sir Philip Tapsell in that morning's paper.

"It's a just a shame it didn't happen before you hired him Lord Grantham," he said.

"Yes I know it was a mistake and that I should have listened to Clarkson," Robert sighed, "But there is no guarantee he could have saved Sybil either of course,"

"She would have had a better chance," Cora said, "Robert, if Mary or Edith get pregnant promise me you will leave it to Clarkson; he does know them best after all,"

"I promise," Robert sighed; he knew when he was brow beaten into submission from countless years of experience.

"How come they don't say whose cases they are investigating?" Tom asked, "Newspapers don't normally care whose pain they dredge up,"

"He has a good point actually," Mary said.

"Maybe we could get Edith to write to the GMC and tell them what happened to Sybil because of him. They would have to take notice because of her title surely and since she now has a different surname it won't embarrass you Lord Grantham,"

"I think Tom actually has a good idea there," Matthew said, "Robert, you and Cora were on opposing sides so perhaps we all could write statements with our account of that night because they all come to the same conclusion; Sybil died because Clarkson was not listened to. Do you think Cousin Violet would agree to do it as well?"

"I can't see why not because unusually she was on Clarkson's side," Mary said.

"When does Edith get back?" Matthew asked.

"Later today but she must be left alone for a couple of days to adjust to her new life and responsibilities," Cora said.

"A statement from Clarkson would help too; plain facts not emotion," Mary said.

"I will ask him," Matthew said, "I am sure he will; he is my step-father after all,"

"I keep forgetting that," Tom said.

OO

Richard was surprised when Matthew dropped by the hospital later that morning.

"Your mother is at home,"

"It's you I came to see,"

Matthew outlined the discussion that he had had over breakfast and Richard smiled broadly.

"I would be more than happy to ensure that witch-doctor gets struck off," he said, "When I read that piece it made my week I can assure you,"

"We're going to ask Edith when she gets back although Cora says she needs time alone with Anthony to adjust to her new home and position,"

"That's understandable," Richard shook Matthew's hand,"I will write something and give it to Isobel,"

OO

Richard spent the evening drafting a statement about what had happened the night of Sybil's death. Isobel knew it was difficult for him so she stayed close by but did not interrupt his train of thought.

Finally he laid down his pen.

"Finished?" Isobel asked.

"As best I can be,"

She went to sit on his lap and put her arms around his neck.

"I love you so much," she murmured into his hair.

"I love you too, darling Isobel," they kissed tenderly.

Before they retired for the night he folded the statement, placed it in an envelope and sealed it.

They had a cuddle and soon drifted off to sleep, Isobel sensing he was emotionally drained from reliving that night. She held him tightly and whispered

"I am so proud of you my darling,"

00

Edith lay in the crook of Anthony's good arm with her head resting on his chest. It had been a wonderful trip but she was glad to be home in Yorkshire about to start her married life for real. They had been very tired when they arrived home the previous evening and gone more or less straight to sleep but now they were wide awake and had made love with an unprecedented reckless passion. They were drenched in sweat and his hair was damp with it but Edith could not help remarking that it made him more gorgeous and desirable than ever. The bright light in his blue eyes told her that he was happy and that was all she wanted for him, for both of them.

OO

During the night Isobel had woken suddenly to feel Richard pressed hard against her back (they usually slept in the spoon position). Isobel realised that she was highly aroused and desperate to feel him inside her.

"I'm sorry to wake you, Isobel," he murmured.

"I'm not bothered Richard my love," she smiled, "I can't remember when I last got woken in the night for a bit of slap and tickle,"

His fingers strayed between her legs and she moaned softly, Richard was pleasantly surprised to feel how aroused she was. He withdrew his fingers and sensuously sucked them clean.

"Richard, I need you inside me," she gasped as his mouth claimed her throat, "I ache in every part of my body for you."

He thrust deep inside her moist wet space and she pushed up against his thrust hard and fast as he caressed her intimately with his hard deft strokes. She clawed his naked back sending shivers through his body. They were panting hard and fast like thirsty wild dogs as she pressed hard and felt waves of desire consume and wash over her before Richard released his seminal fluid deep inside her.

"Oh Richard," she gasped once she had recovered her breath. He was still trembling.

"I love you my darling sweet lass," he murmured, "You give me so much love and comfort I could not exist without you now."

"I need you too Richard," she whispered, "I'm so very proud of you,"

"Thank you," he murmured.

Moments later they had drifted back to sleep enfolded in each other's embrace.

OO

Tom drove Matthew and Isobel over to Locksley a couple of days later.

Edith welcomed them; her eyes shone brightly and they could see that married life and happiness with her beloved Anthony had truly brought her to life. She had a vivacity she had never once possessed during her years of living at Downton; except of course for those moments when Anthony had been present.

She showed them into the library where Anthony was reading. He looked up and smiled.

"You're looking well Sir Anthony," Isobel said.

"I feel it; benefits of having my beautiful Edith beside me I am sure of it. Would you like tea?"

Tea was brought and poured before the butler departed.

"What can we do for you?" Edith asked.

"Have you read about Sir Philip Tapsell?" Matthew asked.

"Yes I did see something the other day when we were on the train back north," Edith said, "If you ask me it is no less than he deserves," she turned to Anthony, "Sir Philip Tapsell was the eminent doctor my father called in; the one who ignored Dr Clarkson's; advice and the consequences were of course Sybil's death,"

"Well we are all sending written accounts to the GMC to give our accounts of that night," Tom said, "Dr Clarkson as well so we wondered if you would help us and write something yourself."

"Of course I will," Edith said, "I will do it tonight and drop it over tomorrow."

"How do GMC enquiries work?" Tom asked Matthew who shrugged.

"Richard says that a doctor has to register when he qualifies and then you hope never to hear from them again unless someone makes a complaint against you," Isobel said, "I think they have a team of independent people to investigate such things,"

"Would Clarkson have to testify?" Mary asked.

"You would need to ask my husband about that," Isobel said, "he knows more about the workings of such things than I do,"

"Well he could need to provide expert medical advice based on his knowledge of Lady Sybil and how the warnings he gave were ignored," Anthony said, "Like Mrs Clarkson I don't know how these things work either but I have no problem with Edith working on this. I was not there so I can busy myself with the estate but I will provide what moral support I can for Lady Sybil would have been my sister-in-law and she was the wife of my good friend here," he placed a hand on Tom's shoulder.

"Thank you Sir Anthony," Tom said.

Anthony went off to speak to the butler while Tom and Matthew were discussing other matters. Isobel took Edith's hand.

"How are you my dear?"

"Oh I feel wonderful cousin Isobel," Edith blinked tears from her eyes, "We are just so blissfully content and he is so just so loving and gentle I am very fortunate. It really makes all the agony worthwhile."

"Getting to be with Richard is the sole good thing to come of Sybil's death," Isobel whispered, "I just wish she had not had to die for us to find each other because I am so proud of him and I really could not be without him now,"

"I reckon Sybil sent him to you," Edith said gently, "I know you are happy,"

OO

Matthew collected the written statements together and had Carson send them to London by courier.

"It's good you are trying to bring justice for Lady Sybil," Carson said as he took the envelope.

"We can only do our best Carson," Matthew said, "But we shall know soon enough,"


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

**A/N: Downton and its characters are not mine; if they were there would have been no 3.3 or 3.5. I have introduced a couple of OCs in this chapter. Dr John Gray, who is a GMC complaints investigator, and his secretary and wife, Hilda.**

**No one appeared to like/believe the pregnancy storyline so it's gone. **

Isobel and Richard were at Downton for dinner. The meal had now finished and they were relaxing in the library with the family.

Carson came in.

"I beg your pardon my lord," he turned to Richard, "There is a telephone call for you Dr Clarkson; a Dr John Gray,"

"I'll come right away," Clarkson said, He turned to the others, "Do please excuse me,"

He left the room.

"I wonder what that's about." Isobel said.

"I'm sure it's nothing to worry about, Isobel," Anthony said, "whatever happens he has your support,"

.Edith linked her arm through her husband's.

It seemed an eternity, although it was in reality no more than ten minutes, before Clarkson came back in.

"Is everything alright?" Robert asked.

Richard swallowed as Isobel put her arm around him and drew him near to her.

"Lord Grantham, Dr John Gray, to whom I just spoke, is a complaints investigator for the General Medical Council. It would seem that a lot of the local doctors who were looking after the affected women before Tapsell came in, are reluctant to testify. They fear his reputation and eminence and fear they would be committing professional suicide,"

"And do you consider it professional suicide Dr Clarkson?" Violet asked.

He shook his head.

"No I do not, Lady Grantham. Someone needs to speak for Lady Sybil and these other women and I will do it. I can tell them the medical facts and symptoms with regard to Lady Sybil's case and he deserves what is coming. I would have done my damndest to save Lady Sybil that night had I had the chance to act soon enough. I have gone over the whole thing in my mind often enough since and this is a chance to vindicate myself and to bring justice for these women killed by his inflated ego. I shall arrange a locum and Isobel and I will go to London. I have no idea how long proceedings will take but there will be a result."

"I know you can nail him, Dr Clarkson," Tom cheered, "If anyone can send the man away with his professional tail between his legs you can,"

"Matthew and I will come too," Mary said, "I'm sure we can stay with Aunt Rosamund,"

"Edith & I will come too," Anthony said, "I promised moral support; I did like Lady Sybil and she would have been my sister-in-law had things been different,"

"I would come too," Tom said, "but in the interests of Sir Philip Tapsell's personal safety I should stay here,"

"We'll look after you Tom," Cora said.

"Thank you Lady Grantham," Tom said.

The dinner party broke up soon after as everyone had arrangements to make.

OO

"I'm so proud of you Richard darling," Isobel said as she pressed a glass of whisky into his hand.

"I'm nervous, Isobel, and the very thought of facing that man again makes me seethe but this time he will listen,"

She put her arm around him, "I will be there for you,"

"I know my darling," he nuzzled her neck, "Your love gives me tremendous courage Isobel darling,"

"You're a brave decent man in your own right, Richard,"

"I know but sometimes I forget,"

Isobel put her arms around him and held him close; her fingertips lightly stroking his back which made him shiver,

"Oh darling Isobel," he murmured into her ear, "You are the most loving supportive wife any man could ask for,"

Isobel held him close as she looked into his eyes.

"I love you Dr Richard Clarkson," she said, "You are a wonderful man; a gifted doctor, a passionate lover, a dear friend and a loving supportive husband,"

"I love you too Mrs Clarkson," he whispered.

OO

Isobel lay in her husband's arms. They were resting after making love..

"Oh Richard," Isobel moaned softly, "I never thought I could need anyone like I need you,"

"I never thought a woman would ever need me, Isobel," he sighed, "When we met I never dared dream that such a beautiful compassionate and sophisticated woman such as you would ever need anyone, much less someone like me, but I was glad to be proved wrong,"

"I didn't think I needed anyone, Richard, or that anyone would need me in that way but that morning when you sobbed in my arms I knew I was wrong too,"

They kissed tenderly and he held her.

"Let's get some sleep," he whispered, "we have a busy few days ahead"

OO

Richard and Isobel were at the station before it got light so that they could catch the first train to London.

Matthew, Mary, Edith & Anthony caught a train later on. They were to stay with Lady Rosamund. They would meet the Clarkson's that evening to talk about their plans.

Edith put her arm around her husband and he held her close with his good arm.

"I love you Lady Strallan," he whispered.

"I love you too," she whispered back.

The train drew into London around lunchtime and they were met by Lady Rosamund and her driver.

Rosamund embraced Mary and Edith.

"You're looking so well, Sir Anthony," she said.

"It's probably something to do with having a loving attentive wife by my side, Lady Painswicke," he smiled.

"Oh Rosamund please, we are family now after all,"

They went to Rosamund's large rambling town house where they were served lunch.

OO

Isabel was not feeling too well but in order not to worry Richard she kept it to herself. She did notice he held her that bit tighter and kept his hand in hers that little bit longer. She felt quqeasy but there had been a bit of a stomach bug going around so she was not too worried; she just resolved to drink as much clear fluid as she could and to rest wherever possible.

They went to the GMC and Richard asked for Dr John Gray saying he had been asked to come with regard to the Tapsell enquiry. The receptionist made a quick phone call.

"Dr Gray will be here shortly, Dr Clarkson," he said, "If you would be so kind as to take a seat over there,"

"Thank you," They sat down on a red plush sofa and Richard kept his hand in Isobel's

Moments later a tall dark haired clean shaven man in his early forties emerged.

"Dr Clarkson? I am Dr John Gray,"

The two men shook hands.

"This is my wife, Isobel," Richard said, "I realise she probably cannot sit in on proceedings but she is here for moral support,"

Gray took Isobel's hand and kissed it.

"You can sit in the outer office Mrs Clarkson; my wife and secretary Hilda will make you tea,"

"Thank you," Isobel said politely.

They went up a short flight of stairs and entered a room where a middle aged woman with dark hair cut in a modern style sat behind a large mahogany desk.

"Hilda, this is Dr and Mrs Clarkson, May I leave Mrs Clarkson in your capable hands?"

"Of course you can, John," she smiled.

Isobel sat while Richard and John went into another office and closed the door.

OO

Hilda made them tea and they chatted. Isobel found herself warming to Hilda for she was intelligent, friendly and clearly loved her husband as much as Isobel loved hers.

"Have you and Dr Clarkson been married long?"

"A little over three months," Isobel smiled.

Hilda whistled, "Phew you gave me the impression you've been together years."

"My late husband, Reginald, was a doctor," Isobel said, "I worked with him and when my son, Matthew, and I moved to Yorkshire from Manchester I took up working with Dr Clarkson, I think there was an attraction straight away although we infuriated the hell out of each other,"

"That's often the way," Hilda smiled, "John has called me an infuriating bitch a few times,"

Isobel decided she liked this woman.

"So what made you move?" Hilda asked.

"Matthew is a solicitor but we are also distant cousins to the Earl of Grantham. His heir died on the Titanic and so Matthew was summoned"

"That all makes sense now," Hilda said, "John and I read the statements that were sent; about how Tapsell's refusal to listen contributed to the death of the earl's youngest daughter."

"That's actually how Richard and I finally found each other," Isobel said, "Tapsell would not listen and he came to me in the early hours. He ended up sobbing in my arms and I realised that I loved him and always had. It was the only good thing to come of Lady Sybil's death; she was such a dear sweet girl."

"It's a tragedy," Hilda said.

"Sybil's husband is devastated," Isobel said, "Tom was the family chauffeur and they ran away together so in addition to grieving he has to try and fit in somewhere he feels he does not belong but he's a very decent young man,"

"I'm sure he is," Hilda said, "So is Matthew married?"

"Yes he married Lady Mary; the earl's eldest daughter,"

"I really hope our husbands between them can nail Tapsell and give him his just deserts," Hilda said

"I never met him but I was affronted that he did not listen to Richard; Sybil might still be alive if he had,"

"That sounds like his way," Hilda said, "Ignoring people who usually know better is his trademark so god knows how he got as far as he did. Must be the title I guess. People won't stand up to him. If I was to get pregnant, Mrs Clarkson, I would not have let him within a mile radius of me even before I knew all this,"

OO

"So all you need to do is answer the questions put to you," Gray said, "they will have read your statement and the others that were sent. It can be a bit nerve-wracking but in the interests of justice for those women it's the only right thing to do,"

"I quite agree," Richard said.

OO

Isobel was feeling very warm and she hastily gulped down some water. Hilda looked concerned. Isobel felt like she was listening to voices far away and she tried to get up but fainted just as Drs Grey and Clarkson came out of the office.

Richard ran to his wife's side and he and Gray helped her onto the couch. Gray instructed Hilda to get more water. Isobel had come around quickly but seemed dazed. Richard sat beside her and held the water to her lips.

Gray examined her while Richard held her hand.

"Well there doesn't appear to be anything wrong except you may be a little run down and it is warm in here," Gray said, "You just need to rest Mrs Clarkson and I am sure once this business is out of the way your husband will be able to relax more and you with him."

"I will take the best care of her," Richard said, "Thank you John,"

"My pleasure Richard; I shall see you at ten o'clock the day after tomorrow and meanwhile take care of Isobel and just relax,"

"I certainly will," Richard put his arm around Isobel after helping her to her feet, "Come on my darling; let's go and meet with the others at Lady Painswicke's."


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

**A/N In this chapter Richard finds his loyalties seriously torn between Isobel and getting some kind of justice for Tapsell's victims. How will he cope?**

Isobel and Richard left Gray's offices; Richard's arm tightly around her. He hailed a cab once out on the street and gave Lady Painswicke's address. Isobel seemed composed after the faint but she looked pale and under strain.

"Isobel darling, why didn't you tell me you felt unwell? I was so worried about you,"

"I'll be alright my darling," she held his hand and gently stroked it, "Maybe I have been overdoing it a bit. I just need rest and I will be fine I assure you. I just didn't like to trouble you with the enquiry and everything,"

"My first loyalty is to my wife," he said gently as he kissed her.

OO

They arrived at Rosamund's house where the butler let them in and showed them into the Drawing Room.

"Mother, are you alright?" Matthew exclaimed noticing how pale Isobel looked.

"I'm fine; I fainted at the GMC offices but Richard just says I need to rest,"

"I can have a maid bring you supper on a tray," Rosamund said.

"That would be very nice Lady Rosamund, thank you," Isobel said.

"If you don't mind Lady Painswicke I shall just make Isobel comfortable," Richard said.

"Of course not, Dr Clarkson, go right ahead," Rosamund said.

OO

Richard led Isobel upstairs where he helped her undress and put on her nightgown,"

"I ache in every joint, Richard, and I feel nauseous,"

Richard felt her forehead.

"Your temperature is a bit raised my darling," he gave her some aspirin and poured a glass of water for her. She swallowed the pills.

He sat on the edge of the bed and she held his hand.

"I'm sorry Richard; I know you have your mind full of the enquiry. That's why I didn't say anything."

He cuddled her "Isobel, I love you and you are the most important person in the world to me. I want you to be well and looked after,"

He cupped her face in his hands,

"I love you too Richard,"

"I will let you rest and come and see you in a little while," he whispered but she was already asleep.

OO

Richard returned to the Drawing Room.

"Is she alright?" Matthew asked.

"I think she is just run down; she has been overdoing things and I should have stopped that. She just needs rest and plenty of clear fluids," he turned to Rosamund," I found a ceramic bowl and put it by the bed in case she has need of it."

"That's fine Dr Clarkson," Rosamund said, "There will be tea here in a moment,"

"Thank you," Richard sat down beside Edith who was distractedly looking into Anthony's blue eyes.

He gave them an account of his meeting with John Gray.

"It's fairly straightforward. They have read my statement and I have to answer questions."

"Will Tapsell be there?" Rosamund asked, "I must admit I thought it was an insult to you for Robert to hire him but no doubt mother put him up to it,"

"As a matter of fact Lady Grantham disapproved of his decision," Richard said, "and yes he will be. I just hope I can keep my mind on the facts of the case as I am now rather concerned for my wife,"

"Mother is pretty tough," Matthew said.

"Well, I have tomorrow to spend with your mother," Richard said. Edith was not surprised to see him blink away tears because she knew he loved Isobel as much as she loved Anthony.

OO

An hour or so later Richard returned to the bedroom. Isobel was awake but seemed listless and looked almost ashen.

"Are you alright my darling?"

She shook her head. "I feel so weak Richard; like I have no energy,"

He placed his hand on her forehead but she did not feel quite as hot for which he was grateful.

He delved into his medical bag.

"What's wrong with me?" Isobel's eyes opened wide with shock.

"I suspect you may be anaemic my love; I was looking for an iron tonic."

"Will it help? I would rather you didn't need to worry about me for the next couple of days at least."

He took out a bottle filled with reddish brown liquid and poured some onto a spoon which he held to her mouth.

"My god that tastes terrible," she almost spat it out.

"You know what they say; the worst something tastes the better it is for you,"

He held her in his arms.

"I need to take a blood sample my darling but as I have no access or contact with a pathology lab down here I might have to phone Dr Gray."

He carefully wiped Isobel's arm and inserted a hypodermic syringe. Isobel winced as he drew blood from her.

"I really ought not to treat my own wife," he said, "that's why I let John examine you earlier. I prefer to be your husband than to be your doctor."

"I prefer that too Richard, I'm sorry,"

"I'll get someone to come and sit with you while I contact Gray."

He put the syringe into a bag and left the room.

"Lady Painswicke, do you have any objection to my using your telephone?"

"Of course not Dr Clarkson,"

Matthew had turned pale and Mary put her arms around him.

"What's wrong with her?" Matthew's bottom lip trembled.

"I suspect that your mother is anaemic, that is deficient in iron. Women routinely lose blood every month so it is more common in women. I have taken a blood sample and I need to contact Dr Gray as he will be able to take it to a lab and get a result. If I am right then I will give her an iron based tonic and she should pick up in hours. She wants you to go and sit with her."

Matthew ran upstairs.

OO

About ten minutes later the butler came in.

"My Lady there is a Dr Gray here,"

"Show him in," Rosamund said.

John Gray walked into the room just as Clarkson was descending the stairs.

"Glad you could come, John; I need you to get Isobel's blood tested for anaemia. She is more than run down."

Richard handed him the sample.

"I will be quick as I can Richard; it may take about an hour with the evening traffic but the test shouldn't take long. I will telephone you,"

"Thank you so much,"

Gray left promptly.

Richard returned to the room. Matthew was holding his mother's hand and she smiled when she saw Richard.

"I will be alright Matthew, trust me."

"I do worry about you mother,"

"I know,"

Mary was standing in the doorway.

"Good job you have a good man to take care of you now Isobel,"

"Oh he is the very best," Isobel grasped Richard's hand, "I love him so very much,"

OO

"Well I hadn't expected this much drama!" Rosamund exclaimed.

"She will be alright," Edith said, "Dr Clarkson won't let anything happen to her because he loves her and I understand that,"

"You see Sir Anthony, what excitement you get when you marry a Crawley girl," Rosamund laughed.

"Well it is a bit more disruption than I am used to," Anthony smiled but in a relaxed way, "But I don't regret marrying your niece, what I regret is not getting it right the first time. I know that Dr Clarkson truly loves Isobel. We must take turns sitting with her on the day of the enquiry so he can feel better knowing she is not alone and hopefully that blood test result is what he thinks so he can treat her."

"You seem to know a fair bit about it," Edith said.

"Maud, the first Lady Strallan, suffered terribly every month. Dr Clarkson was almost always around with some kind of iron tonic. I know he can help Isobel and we can help by being there to keep her company while he is indisposed."

"You have a lovely man there Edith," Rosamund smiled, "Make sure you look after him,"

"She certainly does Lady Rosamund," Anthony said, drawing Edith close to his warm body.

OO

Mary came back downstairs while Richard and Matthew remained with Isobel who was sleeping.

The butler came in

"I have Dr Gray on the telephone for Dr Clarkson, my lady,"

"I'll get him," Mary went upstairs.

"Dr Clarkson, there is a telephone call for you,"

He descended the stairs and picked up the receiver.

"Dr Clarkson,"

"Richard," John said, "the results are back. It is anaemia, not too severe so a week's course of iron supplements should help plus make sure she eats plenty of dark green vegetables and red meat but you already know that."

"Thank god," Richard breathed, tears pricking his eyes, "Thank you John,"

"You're welcome; I'm glad to be of help,"

OO

Everyone was extremely relieved that Isobel's condition was not severe for the uncertainty had been frightening for all of them.

That night Richard slept with Isobel held close to his a warm body and they both slept soundly due to sheer relief.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Isobel felt better when she woke the next morning with Richard's arms around her.

"You look better Isobel," Richard said, "but you still need to rest,"

"I feel better; the aches have gone at any rate,"

"That's good," he nuzzled her neck and shoulder, "You mean so much to me Isobel; I was worried yesterday but hopefully now I know what is wrong we can work on getting you better,"

"At least you have no need to drink that foul tasting tonic," Isobel pulled a face," To be honest Mrs Patmore's salty pudding tasted better,"

"I heard about that," Richard smiled,

"Anthony was very good about it," Isobel said.

"Well you can mix the tonic with more palatable liquids to disguise the taste but you need to take it Isobel,"

"Yes Doctor," Isobel smiled.

OO

They both went down to breakfast and everyone was glad to see Isobel downstairs.

"Isobel still needs a lot of rest," Richard said, "Although the iron tonic will help,"

"We will take it in turns to sit with her tomorrow while you do what you came for," Mary said and Matthew, Edith, Anthony and Rosamund nodded assent.

Isobel sat in a chair in the drawing room and Matthew tucked a blanket around her. Isobel hated being inactive and realised this would be more of a trial of her patience than she had anticipated. A maid brought them coffee.

Richard sat beside his wife and she held his hand.

OO

Anthony invited Richard to go for a short walk and Richard agreed; the two men went out into the crisp autumn day.

"You seem quite at home in London," Richard said.

"After Maud died I spent a lot of time down here at my club and the same after I jilted Edith because I needed to get out of Yorkshire."

"I'm just relived that Isobel isn't seriously ill,"

"She will be fine, you know that," Anthony said, "remember you were always giving Maud iron tonics because she had a bad time every month,"

Richard smiled, "I had forgotten about that,"

"I'm glad you have Isobel," Anthony said, "you seem very happy and I'm glad. I know how you feel about her because I feel the same way about Edith,"

"It's funny how things work out," Richard said, "I had always loved Isobel although I did not admit it to myself for a long time. But if I had not gone to her the morning Lady Sybil died then we would probably still be circling each other afraid to make a move,"

"Well if Isobel had not invited me to your wedding then Lady Edith and I would not be together and trust me I am so grateful for that. I made such a huge mistake that day," Anthony sighed, "I can't live without her now; she is my reason for getting up, my first thought and sight on waking and last before sleeping. She is just so beautiful and loving,"

"I can't live without Isobel either," he sighed, "I realise now I only existed before we found each other but she makes me feel so alive and so loved.""

"I understand that more than you can ever know," Anthony shivered, " We will look after her tomorrow and I know you will do a good job because, although she won't be there, you will feel her presence and draw on the strength it gives you,"

"It makes such a difference having a strong confident loving woman behind you," Richard said.

"Lady Edith is my strength and succour," Anthony said.

"Isobel is mine," Richard said, "I was in such a mess emotionally the morning Lady Sybil died. I did consider going home and getting drunk but I feared being alone with my thoughts and the thought Isobel might hold me spurred me on to seek her out. She gave me whisky and asked me to tell her what had happened and I just broke down. It was almost like she was holding me together physically and emotionally and I realised then that I needed her and did not care if admitting it made me weak because I would rather be weak and have Isobel than be strong and alone."

"That's exactly how I feel about Edith," Anthony said.

"Treasure her Anthony; these wonderful wives of ours have been sent to us for a reason,"

"Edith was sent to me twice although I made such a lousy mistake the first time but believe me; thoughts of her sustained me throughout the war. You know what a mess I was when I came home and I believe I would have scared her away had she seen me then but because of her I made it home whereas other younger men did not and I carried her photograph in my pocket all the time. I would look at that picture many times when I felt like putting a bullet in my head and it gave me the courage to live another day,"

They returned to Rosamund's for lunch.

Isobel had taken her tonic and Richard held her tightly. She looked a lot brighter; less pale and drawn. Richard put his arms around her. Mary & Matthew had gone for a walk.

OO

"What did you and Dr Clarkson talk about?" Edith asked Anthony that night as she put on her nightgown after helping him undress. They usually dispensed with nightwear but felt it would be wrong in someone else's home.

"We talked about life and love mainly,"

Edith pulled back the bedclothes and got into bed beside her husband.

"He really does love Isobel doesn't he?"

"Yes, very much; almost as much as I love you but not quite," he drew her close to him.

They kissed tenderly; Edith trembling as his sensual mouth caressed her throat and jaw line before moving back to her mouth and exploring her.

"I really do love you Anthony,"

"I love you too, my darling. When I was at war I carried your photograph and looked at it often. When I came home I would look at it whenever I thought about putting a bullet in my head and I drew strength from you somehow. Isobel gives Clarkson strength beyond belief. He was an emotional wreck the morning Lady Sybil died and he told me something very poignant. He said he realised he needed her and he would rather admit he needed her than stand strong and be alone. That's how I feel about you my darling Lady Strallan. You give me strength and courage."

"You give me strength too, Anthony, and that is simply because you let me be myself,"

They kissed again and then his mouth began to nuzzle and caress her neck and shoulder.

"I need to make love to you Lady Strallan; I feel a real need to do so. I know we are not at home but everyone is in bed and we are down the corridor from our gracious hostess. I want to feel how you love me and I want to appreciate you fully; my darling beautiful wife."

"Oh Anthony I need that too," she whispered as his head descended to pleasure her already moist sex. Moments later she shook as a violent climax tore through her body. Moments later he slid inside her and her arms went around his neck and caressed his shoulder. She pushed up against him and moments later they were sweating.

"Oh Edith," he moaned loudly as he released his sticky seminal fluid inside her.

They lay together holding each other.

"I wish I was pregnant Anthony," she sighed.

"You don't know that you are not," he replied, "It's just too soon to be able to tell as we have been married just over a month,"

They kissed before settling down to sleep.

OO

Richard held Isobel close.

"You look better," he whispered, "The tonic is obviously helping."

"I have a bit more strength now," she said, "but I do feel a bit dizzy sometimes; especially if I try to get up too quickly,"

"It will get better Isobel; did you get any sleep?"

"I had a couple of hours this morning,"

"That's good," he began to nuzzle her neck, "oh Isobel darling, I love and need you so very much and tomorrow I will draw great strength from that. Anthony and I talked today about love and need so I know he loves Edith the way I love you,"

"I didn't think I would want to be looked after," Isobel said, "But I really do need you Richard and I like being looked after by you."

"I didn't think anyone would ever want to take care of me, Isobel,"

"You silly man," she held him close and stroked his back, "I wanted to look after you from the moment we met although it took me nearly eight years to realise it."

She kissed him tenderly, not once releasing him from her tight embrace.

"I will be there with you in spirit tomorrow," she said.

"I know my darling, Thank you,"

They settled down and went to sleep; their bodies entwined.

OO

Breakfast was early the next morning. Richard seemed agitated so Isobel gave his shoulders a good massage and he relaxed.

He made sure Isobel took her tonic; she was getting used to the taste but he encouraged her to concentrate on recovering her former vitality.

He kissed her gently,

"I wish you all the best," she whispered.

"I will do the best I can," he said, "Only the bare medical facts that were ignored that night will help now; late as it is. I mean it can't save Sybil or those other women now but I can give them a voice,"

"That's what matters," Edith said.

Dr Richard Clarkson left the house and made his way to the GMC enquiry with a distinct feeling that he was going to his own execution.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

**A/N: I have absolutely no idea of the format of GMC complaints hearings take so I have kind of made this up to suit purpose but as long as the facts are heard it should be okay.**

Richard strode purposefully into the GMC building just as Dr John Gray descended the stairs. The two men shook hands.

"How is Mrs Clarkson?"

Richard smiled, "She is much better thank you; the tonic has made a real difference. I was so worried about her."

"It's natural; if Hilda gets sick I worry myself daft too even though I can do something about it."

"Just goes to prove that we are only human I suppose," Richard said.

"Very true; Tapsell thinks he is above the law and above humanity so his ego protects him from the notion that he too is fallible. The fall from the pedestal will be far."

They sat down.

"The Committee consists of a surgeon, a doctor and a Magistrate," Gray said, "We need the magistrate because we have no powers of arrest,"

"You think he might have to do time?" This was better than he had hoped for.

Gray shrugged "Who knows but he is there for that eventuality," he put his hand on Richard's shoulder, "Isobel is here with you in spirit and all you need to do is give them the facts as they stand. Try to keep emotion out of it as far as possible although I realise that won't be easy with him sitting there,"

Richard walked into the enquiry and was asked to sit at a long table facing the committee. He saw Tapsell sitting there; hands folded in his lap and face an impenetrable mask devoid of emotion.

"Dr Clarkson we have read your statement pertaining to Lady Sybil Crawley and the involvement of the accused on the night in question. We realise this may be difficult for you but we must ask you to try, as far as possible, to stick to the facts."

"I understand," Richard said.

"How long had you known Lady Sybil Crawley?"

"Twenty-four years because I delivered her; I delivered all of Lord Grantham's three daughters,"

"So you would say you knew her pretty well?"

"Yes, I knew her full medical history and had the privilege of working with her when she was a volunteer nurse during the war, when Lord Grantham's home was a convalescent hospital."

"How did you feel when Lord Grantham hired the accused to preside over the birth of his first grandchild?"

"I was aggrieved, I will admit, but Lord Grantham is a powerful man and I did not see a way to challenge his decision,"

Richard steeled himself as he gave an account of how he had tried to intercede medically on Sybil's behalf. He spoke of how he had asserted that Sybil did not have thick ankles and that she had seemed confused. He told how he had raised the assertion that Sybil was showing signs of eclampsia but this had been disregarded vehemently by Tapsell, who frowned; the only sign of emotion to cross his face so far.

It was a lot more difficult than he had imagined, reliving that night; especially without Isobel by his side. He allowed himself the luxury of remembering how he felt when she held him.

He went on to relate how he had insisted an emergency caesarean would give Sybil the best chance but been ignored on account of Tapsell's assertion that the risk of infection would be prevalent from such a procedure. He kept his voice as matter of fact as he could while still inflecting enough nuance to display the strong emotions he felt at his professional pride being dashed to pieces.

Richard's throat was dry so he helped himself to a glass of water and sipped it slowly before continuing his account.

"The decision was deferred to Lady Sybil's husband I believe?"

"Yes and he begged me to get Lady Sybil to the hospital to give her the best chances and I felt sick when I had to tell him it was already too late.

He sipped more water realising how much he wanted Isobel to hold him at that moment.

"What happened then Dr Clarkson?" a gentle prompt.

"Lady Sybil delivered a daughter and the accused was smug as anything," he felt anger rise then and dug his nails into his palms.

What happened then?"

"The usual post natal congratulations and celebrations but Lady Sybil was tired and went to sleep. I had hoped my fears had been wrong but we were woken in the night. She was gripped by convulsions brought on by the eclampsia and she did not recognise her family. Her family begged me to do something but I knew that now the convulsions had begun there was nothing I could do and it galled me to have to tell them that. Moments later she died and I felt deeply for them for Lady Sybil was a dear sweet gentle girl."

It took all the emotional courage he possessed to blink the tears from his eyes. Tapsell's face remained an impassive mask; in that moment Richard hated him more than he had ever hated anyone and the hatred left a nasty acrid bile taste in his mouth and throat. The violent emotion startled him and he dug his nails harder into his palms knowing it would take every bit of self control he possessed not to lay the man out cold.

"In conclusion gentlemen," his voice cracked, "I firmly believe that Lady Sybil Crawley would still be alive had I been able to act. It was not a hundred per cent guarantee I could have saved her but her chances would have been greater."

Richard was sent to wait outside and Hilda brought him tea which he drank gratefully

"You did very well in there Richard," John said.

"I don't know how I resisted the urge to lay him out cold; it took every bit of self control I possessed not to."

"I would say that your wife has lent you some moral courage," John put his hand on Richard's shoulder, "It won't be long now."

Shortly afterwards he was called back in. He noticed that there were now two uniformed police officers in the room.

"Sir Philip Tapsell. In light of the evidence we have heard from Dr Clarkson I have no choice but to enforce the recommendation that you be struck off from the medical register and no longer allowed to practise medicine or surgery. You will pay compensation to the spouses and families of the women who died and in addition you will serve two years in prison, You are lucky you are not younger for then I would recommend a longer sentence. Take him away,"

The two police officers took Tapsell out of the room.

OO

Matthew, Mary & Rosamund were sitting with Isobel drinking afternoon tea. Edith & Anthony had gone to a classical concert in Hyde Park.

Isobel looked much better and felt stronger due to the iron tonic.

"You look much better, mother," Matthew said.

"I feel much better; I just wish that tonic did not taste so vile,"

She folded her hands in her lap.

"I hope Richard will be alright; it won't be easy for him having to relive what happened that night. I know it isn't easy for any of you but he was an emotional wreck when he came to me that morning. I just wish I could be there for him."

"He will be fine," Rosamund said.

"I hope so," Isobel sighed, "but I do have the utmost faith in him and if anyone can get justice for Sybil and those other women he can,"

"You seem very happy together," Rosamund said.

"Yes we are; I just wish I had realised sooner how I felt about him because we wasted so much time when we could have been together. I never expected to find love again after Reginald died and certainly not with another doctor but he is so much more than that. He really is a lovely man, and he is taking such good care of me. I am very fortunate and doubly so in that I was able to help Edith and Sir Anthony, When two people are meant to be together they should be and those two are."

"It was certainly one in the eye for my mother when they rekindled their romance and married," Rosamund said.

"None of us wanted to face the fact that she loved him," Mary said, "but she comes alive when he walks in a room and he is actually a sweet man; not exactly outgoing but not boring and they are so happy."

"He loves her for herself and lets her be that," Matthew said, "and she accepts him for what he is too. That is the stuff true romance is built on."

"It certainly is," Isobel agreed.

"Maybe Richard will take you away for a few days to relax and recuperate," Matthew suggested, "I am sure he could do with it after today,"

OO

Anthony held Edith close to him as the last notes of the concert drifted away on the warm late afternoon air. The concert had been deeply moving; reminiscent of the one that they had been to before the war.

He kissed her tenderly on the mouth as they began to drift away from the crowd.

"I look forward to having you all to myself again," he murmured.

"It will be nice," she agreed, "Oh Anthony my darling. I do love you so very much and you are the best husband any woman could wish for,"

"I love you too, Lady Strallan, and you are a wonderful loving wife,"

"You light up a room when you walk into it and you make me feel so alive," she kissed him, "Let's go back to Aunt Rosamund's as Dr Clarkson should be back soon,"

"I am sure he has done well," Anthony said, "He is a man of dignity and integrity so he and Isobel are well matched; not to mention that he is rather in love with her,"

"I'm rather in love with you too, Sir Anthony Strallan," Edith stroked his back.

"I'm in love with you too, my lovely Lady Strallan,"

They returned to Rosamund's house.

OO

They were sitting around drinking tea when Richard walked in. Isobel went and threw her arms around him; the way she looked into his eyes leaving no one in any doubt that she loved him.

The maid came in and brought him tea as he sat next to his wife.

"He got struck off, ordered to pay financial compensation to the spouses and families of the women who died and best of all he got two years in prison. He showed no emotional at all throughout not even when he was taken away. It didn't touch him at all but how can a man be a doctor and not care about humanity?"

"At least you cared enough about your patient to try and save her," Edith said.

"It took every last bit of self control I possessed to not lay him out cold,"

"I doubt Tom will accept his money," Matthew said, "but I'll try and persuade him,"

"Lady Rosamund may I use your telephone?" Richard asked, "I have to call Lord Grantham,"

"Help yourself," Rosamund said.

Dinner was a happy cheerful meal; Lord Grantham had been delighted with the result.

OO

"Richard darling, I am so very proud of you," Isobel said that evening as they lay in bed in each other's arms.

"It was very tough Isobel; it took it out of me emotionally reliving it and it took all the courage I had not to cry when I spoke of Lady Sybil's final moments. I have never hated anyone as much as I came to hate Tapsell at that moment," he looked into her eyes,

"Isobel, please hold me like you did that morning,"

Her arms slipped around him and he wept in her arms; releasing all the emotion he had been forced to hold in all that day. Isobel said nothing; just let him cry while she soothed him and stroked his back.

"I really am so proud of you," she said.

"Oh Isobel I realised today how much I really do need you. I felt almost lost without you by my side I concentrated on what I had gone to do and held together but you have no idea how good it feels to let go,"

"I know my darling," she kissed him tenderly, "I think we should go away for a short holiday because we both need to relax for a bit and just enjoy the sea air,"

"Do you fancy anywhere in particular," he asked nuzzling her neck, "only I have heard that Scarborough is very nice this time of year,"

"Richard, I don't care where we go as long as we are together,"

"Nor do I," he murmured, "Scarborough it is then,"


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

The following day they returned to Yorkshire by the morning train. When they finally pulled into York station they were taken straight to Downton.

"I'm very grateful for what you did, Dr Clarkson," Tom said, "I don't want his money but I am glad he can't ruin anyone else's life. I know him going to prison can't bring Sybil or those other women back but it is no less than he deserved."

"It wasn't easy Tom. He showed no emotion whatsoever, even when he was taken away. It took every bit of self control I had not to lay him out cold,"

"That is exactly what I _would_ have done and got myself into trouble; although he isn't worth the energy,"

OO

After dinner Robert invited Clarkson to join him in the library,"

"Very well Lord Grantham but then we must leave because Isobel needs to rest,"

"Matthew told me what happened; will she be alright?"

"She's already much better on account of the iron tonic, Lord Grantham; you didn't see her three days ago"

"No I didn't. I am glad you married her. I almost envy your happiness,"

"She is everything to me, Lord Grantham. She comforted me when I needed it and reliving that night was far from pleasant but the fact that he has got what he deserved is reward enough,"

Robert put his hand on Richard's shoulder.

"I should like to apologise to you, dear man. We did not consider your feelings or opinions that night, at least I did not, and because of that my daughter died. She might still be here had I sent him away and listened to you and I have to live with that for the rest of my life but I am truly sorry. No man likes to have his professional integrity or pride insulted."

"We didn't know his track record then Lord Grantham," Richard replied, "Nothing can bring Lady Sybil or those other women back but hopefully he now has time to reflect on his actions and hopefully prison will teach him a harsh lesson in humility but I accept your apology,"

"Look after cousin Isobel,"

"Oh I will do that until my last breath; she and I need to go away for a few days as it will help get her back to full strength and I could use some time away,"

OO

"Dr Clarkson," Edith said when he had come out of the library, "Anthony has a bit of pain in his bad arm; could you take a look?"

"Of course,"

Anthony and Richard went into the library.

"There is actually nothing wrong," Anthony admitted, "it's just an excuse so I can get home and have my lovely wife to myself."

"I can't argue with that," Richard said, "Isobel needs to rest,"

OO

Edith nestled close to her husband in the back of the car.

"There is nothing at all wrong with my arm," he murmured seductively in her ear, "I just thought it would be jolly nice to spend a whole evening and night in bed naked with my beautiful wife,"

"I thought as much," Edith whispered, "I was going to have an imaginary headache if that hadn't worked," she held his good hand, "Oh Anthony darling I have this irresistible urge to undress my gorgeous husband and let him seduce me,"

"Your wish is my command Lady Strallan," he winked at her.

OO

Two days later Richard and Isobel went to Scarborough for a much deserved break.

They checked into a small guest house and went for a walk on the beach. Isobel was feeling so much better and fiercely proud of her husband for bringing Tapsell to justice.

It was a warm evening as they walked along hand in hand. They had left their shoes behind a rock and were barefoot at the water's edge as the waves lapped gently about their ankles. The sun was setting and the water sparkled red and gold in the dying rays of the sun.

Richard pulled Isobel into his arms and kissed her passionately; exploring her mouth and throat. She melted into his embrace and gently stroked his back.

It was a beautiful moment and neither spoilt it with words. They just stood there, holding each other. Isobel looked into her husband's eyes and gently trailed her fingertips down his cheek

They turned and walked back to their guesthouse stopping in a pub en route. Isobel drank white wine, Richard had whisky, and they held hands tightly across the wooden table.

"I love you Dr Clarkson," she whispered, "and I am going to show you just how much I appreciate you tonight,"

"I look forward to it Mrs Clarkson," he whispered back and Isobel felt a shiver run down her back as she always did when he called her by her married name. She could not hide just how alive and content she felt being alone with the man she loved without the usual distractions. He was handsome and everything she wanted.

He studied her. God she was beautiful to him; his Isobel was so alive and made him so happy. Her support and faith in him had never wavered. He had never dreamt that terrible morning, when he had sought understanding and comfort, that her love would provide him with sanctuary and make him rethink his life and reassess his priorities for the better. The enquiry had brought justice and the desired result; no one was shedding tears for Tapsell's incarceration but Richard Clarkson still maintained that the best and only good thing to come from Sybil's death was he and Isobel finding each other. He knew that he would love her until his dying breath and he looked forward to every day beside her.

"Darling Isobel," he murmured, "you are everything to me and I love you more than I can ever say. I admire you for your courage and compassion; your support and belief in me is second to none. How did I ever get to be so fortunate at my time of life?"

Tears filled her eyes.

"Oh Richard darling, you mean everything to me too. You have taken such good care of me that I feel strong as an ox now and just knowing I can turn to you gives me total peace," she stroked his hand, "You have had a tough time of it but I hope I give you peace too,"

"Oh Isobel, you are more than a source of peace you are my sanctuary,"

He raised her hand to his lips and kissed it.

He leaned across and whispered, "Right now I want to take my loving beautiful wife home, undress her and make love to her all night long,"

"I like the sound of that," she murmured.

OO

Edith and Anthony were making love. Her arms were around his neck as she pushed up hard and fast against his passionate thrust.

"Oh Edith," he moaned as he released his sticky seminal fluid inside her.

She lay still in the crook of his good arm and looked into those blue eyes that made her melt inside. She was bitterly disappointed because she had just had another monthly visit.

He comforted her as she sobbed.

"It will happen my love," he whispered, "We will just have to try a bit harder and there will be absolutely no hardship in that,"

"I know," she sighed.

OO

Richard pulled Isobel into his arms as soon as the door was shut and they scrambled to undress each other; stopping to kiss and caress. His mouth caressed her breasts as his tongue swirled around her erect nipples and she shivered violently. They collapsed on the bed a naked tangle of limbs, hands and mouths caressing ardently. He pleasured her sex; sending waves of pleasure washing over her as she began to shake violently.

"Oh Richard," she moaned. His mouth continued to caress her into a total frenzy and made every nerve ending in her body tingle and ache for him even as she felt him trembling. He had a way of taking her to the brink, making her absolutely crave him before he took her for a fast ride over the apex of desire. He excited her.

"Richard," she begged her voice hoarse with ardent desire, "I need you inside me now before I explode."

He moved back up her body and slipped inside her with long steady strokes which caressed her into a deliciously erotic heaven. She closed her eyes to heighten the sensation as her arms went around his neck and drew his head down for a passionate kiss as her hands roamed his back and shoulders.

"Oh Isobel," he moaned softly. They were slicked with sweat but still far from sated. Finally half an hour or so later he gasped her name as he released his stickiness inside her body and moments later her body responded.

He lay on top of her for a moment to recover his breath; thinking that if he died at that moment he would die happy.

He pulled her close to him and she rested her head on his chest.

"Oh darling Richard," she murmured, "I love you so much,"

"I love you too Isobel," he murmured back, "more than you can ever know,"

OO

**Four months later**

.Edith knelt on the bathroom floor sweating and shaking. She had just been sick for the fourth morning in a row and she was hopeful.

Anthony crouched beside her and put his good arm around her. She swallowed hating the taste of the bile. She melted against him feeling fragile like she was made of glass.

"I'm sorry to have woken you again my darling," she said.

"It's alright Edith darling; please don't ever apologise,"

"Do I dare to hope this month?"

"I dare to hope my sweet lovely Lady Strallan," he crooned softly tangling his fingers in her coppery hair. "We will call Dr Clarkson later but I want you to rest today,"

"I won't argue with you about that; I'm exhausted," she whispered.

He helped her to her feet and led her back to bed where he poured her a glass of water to take the nasty taste away.

"Get some sleep my love," he said, "When you wake up I will be right here beside you,"

"Thank you my love," she whispered.

OO

Anthony waited outside the room while Clarkson examined his wife.

"You're definitely pregnant, Lady Strallan," he smiled, "Almost four months so you will start to show soon,"

Edith smiled.

"You're in the best possible hands; Sir Anthony will take care of you as will I when your time comes,"

"You are the only doctor I want," Edith said.

Clarkson came out of the room.

"Lady Strallan is definitely pregnant, Sir Anthony. She will begin to show soon,"

"That's wonderful," Anthony gasped.

"I will look after her, don't worry."

"I know you will; if it was not for you and Isobel we would not be together to celebrate this happy moment,"

He went into the room and Edith threw her arms around him.

"Oh Anthony, at long last it's happened. You can't know how proud I am to be carrying your heir,"

"Oh my precious darling, I am so pleased," he kissed her.

OO

The next few months passed; As her time drew near Edith spent her days reading previously unknown literary gems from Anthony's library and taking short brisk walks around the Locksley estate which felt more like home to her than Downton ever had because here her opinion was listened to and she was appreciated and valued. Anthony's servants loved her and everyone was excited at the impending arrival of an heir for their beloved master.

Robert, Cora, Violet and Tom were at Locksley for supper. Mathew had had to take care of some personal business back in Manchester and had taken Mary with him as she wanted to see where he had come from.

They were in the library after dinner, drinking coffee, when Edith felt a sharp twinge. She tried to ignore it but then another came and she was distinctly aware of something wet running down her legs.

"Anthony," she gripped his arm, "The baby is coming,"

"It's a week early," he turned pale and he rang for the butler.

"Oakley, please telephone Dr Clarkson and tell him Lady Strallan is in labour,"

"Very good Sir Anthony,"

Cora and Violet helped Edith upstairs to her room which she had never slept in until now

"It will be alright," Tom said.

"I really hope so," Anthony was pale and his forehead was beaded with perspiration. "I won't relax until I know it's over, not after the last time when I lost them both,"

Anthony was pacing and Robert put a hand on his shoulder.

"It will be alright dear chap,"

"I really hope so Lord Grantham,"

Richard and Isobel arrived moments later and Anthony excused himself to show them upstairs. Violet came back down with him but Cora stayed to help.

"It will be alright Anthony,"

"I am sure it will, Lady Grantham, but after what happened with the first Lady Strallan I really will not relax until it's over,"

Tom pressed a glass of whisky into Anthony's hand.

"Thank you Tom, have one yourself too,"

OO

As the night wore on Cora and Isobel took turns to wipe Edith's face with a damp cloth. Thankfully there was no apparent distress on the part of either Edith or the baby. Richard gave her a little morphine because she was in pain but other than that he kept encouraging her.

"She will be alright won't she Dr Clarkson?" Cora's bottom lip trembled and Isobel put an arm around her shoulders knowing she was thinking about Sybil.

"It will be fine Lady Grantham," he said,

He glanced down between Edith's legs.

"I can see the head," he announced, "I want you to push now Lady Strallan, push as hard as you can."

Edith made a supreme effort for she was tired.

"Come on, once more,"

Edith pushed and the baby shot out followed by a gush of sticky embryonic fluid. Richard clamped and cut the cord and passed the baby to Isobel who cleaned him up and wrapped him in a shawl.

"You have a son, Lady Strallan," he said, "Congratulations."

Isobel placed the baby at his mother's breast where he fed hungrily.

"I need to see Anthony," Edith said, "I know he will be tormented because of what happened to Maud."

"I'll go and fetch him," Richard said.

"I want you and Isobel to be godparents," Edith said, "if it weren't for you we would never have got back together,"

"I would be honoured, Lady Strallan,"

OO

"You have a son, Sir Anthony," Clarkson said entering the room, "He is fine and Lady Strallan is tired but elated. There were no problems at all."

Anthony almost ran upstairs and lingered on the threshold.

Edith looked at him.

"Come and meet your son," she said.

"Congratulations," Cora said as she and Isobel left the room.

Anthony sat on the bed and Edith placed the baby in the crook of his good arm. Anthony's eyes filled with tears.

"He's beautiful," he gasped.

"I know," Anthony kissed them both, "Hello Anthony Richard Strallan,"

"That's nice," Edith said, "He has been good to us,"

OO

Isobel and Richard returned to Crawley House just before dawn broke.

Richard put his arms around Isobel.

"Tonight was a very special moment for me," he breathed, "Lord Grantham has a grandson and the mother survived. I feel totally vindicated, Isobel and to think we will be godparents. That is the closest I will get to fatherhood. I wish to god I had met you years ago,"

"I think Anthony was relieved,"

"I'm not surprised. He went through hell with the late Lady Strallan and the baby didn't make it either but he will be a good father."

Isobel kissed him.

"Richard darling, I am just so glad to be your wife because you make me feel so alive; I love you so much and will do until my last breath."

"I'm privileged to love you Isobel and I truly am yours until my last breath too."

"Let's get some rest now," she murmured, "I just want to hold you for what's left of the night."

"That my darling sounds like a good plan,"

He took her hand and they went upstairs to their room knowing that whatever storms came they would weather them together. When they had uttered the words until death us do part they had meant them with every fibre of their being.

**A/N: Thanks for reading to the end. I thought it was about time someone wrote a story where Tapsell got his just desserts and let's hope he will learn a lesson in humility while in prison. But most of all the pleasure in writing is the exploration of character relationships and exploring the love and devotion between them.**

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